2 year Anniversary Celebration

This weekend our family celebrated two years of living in China! We decided last year that each year on our arrival date to China (Sept. 4) our family would celebrate together what we've experienced over the preceding year. So when we asked the kids how they would like to celebrate this year, we weren't too surprised when they suggested a trip to the zoo again (we went last year, and the zoo continues to be their favorite spot to frequent!). We decided to celebrate on Saturday rather than Sunday (which was technically our anniversary date) so that we could have the full day, rather than just a short window of time (Sundays always seem to fly by for us as we leave for our international fellowship at 9:30 and don't get home until around 1:30 if we grab lunch--usually at McDonalds--on our way home).

When we arrived at the zoo, I immediately foresaw a potential problem--lots of people! There were cars parked all along the street, blocks before you even got to the entrance. I gave the kids riding in the back of the three wheeler a little pep talk about the crowds and high likelihood of lots of photo opportunities, as well as a reminder of how we were called to be kind and love all those around us--and received the usual, "Yeah, yeah. Got it, Mom. We know." I was totally surprised to find out that in spite of the large number of people at the zoo, my 4 little ones weren't the main attraction at any of the exhibits we visited! The kids had a ball feeding the animals in the petting zoo area for quite some time before moving on to the hippos.

Unfortunately at the hippo exhibit, we had a little mishap. Kevin had just lifted Hudson up onto a fence-type structure when Hud lost his balance and fell forward. His face stopped his fall, as he collided with the metal poles intended to keep people out and the hippos in. We immediately saw that the gash on his eyebrow was pretty wide and seemed to be quite deep. We had a plethora of kind Chinese people rush to our aid--offering band-aids and all sorts of advice. After we got his wound cleared up and the damage assessed, Kevin and I were both pretty sure he needed stitches, so I made a call to the international clinic that is in town. Unfortunately, they have changed their policy so that they now only see members (before you could come one time without a membership)--and members, we are not! I was somehow able to talk one of the doctors into pulling some strings for us and got the receptionist to agree to let Hud in the door. Kevin (quickly!) rode him over to the clinic, and there it was determined that giving him stitches was not the best option (the wound was wide enough that giving him stitches probably would have left a worse scar). So Hud recovered quickly, got ice cream on the way home for his bravery, and now is proudly sporting a different band-aid each day on his eyebrow. No doubt he is going to have one more scar, which ironically mirrors almost perfectly the one he has had for the last 2+ years on his OTHER eyebrow--the one he has from stitches her received after jumping off of a sofa and into the edge of a coffee table! And the blows just keep on comin'...

The other 3 kids and I stayed at the zoo and finished up our afternoon for another few hours before returning home for rest time. One of my favorite moments was when the kids visited the gorilla that we have seen before and were able to get him to dance with them! We've seen before that he enjoys mimicking the people he sees on the other side of the glass, so when Eli started kicking his feet and swinging his arms, the gorilla was only too pleased to join in the fun--much to the amusement of every person standing around or passing by!

We let the kids pick the dinner menu--and were surprised that they chose jiaozi again over pizza! We then did our favorite evening past time, walking to our local market store (about a 10 minute walk) to buy ice cream (or popsicles). The last photo is in front of the market store (with a view of one of my favorite fruit vendors behind them). We all agreed, our 2nd anniversary was a fun-filled day in which we were able to recount MUCH for which we are thankful!

Bugs and Milkshakes

Our themes for the past two weeks--bugs and milkshakes! We've discovered a plethora of both! The number of snails, roly polies, and giant black ants has definitely increased as the weather begins to cool off and the rain becomes more frequent. And the kids are LOVING it--the boys especially! After Eli found a new class pet (a lizard he found outside during recess), Hud was motivated to do the same. So he convinced his class that THEIR new class pet was the stink bug he discovered on the playground! His teacher (wisely!) sent it home with him after allowing it to stay in the class room (and even share in their snack during snack time) for about two days. I think I allowed it to stay in our house for less than one--then was able to convince him that the stink bug really wanted to return to his family OUTSIDE our apartment.

Noah's fascination with the living things around us continues to grow; and his favorite past time is to hunt for black ants to step on and snails to let crawl around on him during our walks back home after dropping the other three kids off at the bus stop at 7am each morning. He had a new favorite highlight this week as we walked past the body of water in our apartment community. Three men had nets they were dropping in the water to catch small silver-colored minnows. Noah struck up a quick friendship with one of the men who waited patiently for Noah to reach into his net and help him remove the fish from the net and place them into his bag--with Noah squealing with delight the entire time! We "fished" with this kind man for a good half an hour before I could convince Noah it was time to head home (I was in need of another cup of coffee at the time!).

Our other new favorite discovery is a place in our apartment complex that advertises itself as a "yogurt" shop--but really should be bragging about their milkshakes! We had some friends recommend it as a fun place to get a treat, and are so thankful they did. In a place where retail and food vendors seldom last very long, we're doing everything we can to help keep them in business, frequenting the "shop" regularly! You can see a picture of the kids at the window where we order and then wait when we stopped by for an after-school treat one afternoon this week.

The last picture is around our kitchen table with one of our favorite "new normals" in the Joseph household--chopsticks used to eat jiao zi! We asked our ayi to make jiao zi (like dumplings with all kinds of different fillings inside--our favorite is pork and green beans) and then dip them in a vinegar soy sauce. The kids think the dipping and chopsticks part is as much fun as the eating, and usually have a contest to see who can eat the most (Eli holds the record with eating 5)!

I knew we were back in China this week when Kevin and I had a quick lunch date. While we were at the noodle restaurant that Kevin had spotted earlier and wanted to try out for the first time, we ordered then tried to find a seat. All the tables had people seated at them (there were about 8 tables in all), so we picked one that was less crowded--only one person in a four-top. The man didn't even flinch when Kevin and I squeezed in to sit at his table, and I thought how funny the person's reaction would have been if we were in the US trying to pull that one! Our noodles came, and we ended up eating them as quickly as we could, as we discovered we were about the only ones in the whole place who weren't enjoying a smoke along with their noodles, making the experience a little less enjoyable! Guess it wasn't our most romantic of lunch dates... :)

..."no cattle in the stalls"

I'm totally amazed. We've been back in China now for about a week and a half, and the transition to life here has gone so smoothly! I've got to admit, Kevin and I both had our doubts as to how the kids (in particular) would make the adjustment back to our "new normal". As I mentioned previously--our two months in the US were amazing. Our time with friends and family and the activities the kids got to participate in were more than we could have hoped for. From ballet camp to VBS, from the Dallas Arboretum and Children's Science Museum to the beaches of Florida; the kids had one incredible experience after another. And the genuinely LOVED every bit of it--and we felt (very gratefully) that they didn't seem to take it all for granted, either. So with two months of every day being the equivalent to Disney World in their little minds, how were they going to make the leap back to Tinajin, where literally the most excitement we have to offer here is the zoo (which is too hot to go to this time of year), McDonalds (which doesn't even have any sort of play area), and the local market that sells popsicles (and is a far cry from Marble Slab, to say the least!)?

Would you believe that everyone of the kids (Karis the least so) have said several times how thankful they are to be back in China?! Every time one of them says it, Kevin and I exchange glances, surprised and thrilled at the same time. I recently read a passage in Habakkak 3 that talks about how even if there are "no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior". I feel like my kids are living this out before our eyes! They have SO little here that the world says they should value and pursue, and yet they are content, even happy.

Now while I wish I could claim that this perspective comes from incredible spiritual maturity for my 7, 5, and 4 year olds, I think there's probably a better explanation. We definitely experience a sense of intense togetherness as a family that is really hard to replicate in the busyness of a typical day's schedule in the US. And maybe this place in which we've lived for two years (almost) just feels like home with their own beds, their own toys. Or it might just be His grace over our family in finding joy where He has us. Whatever the reason (or reasons) might be, we are singing His praises that our kids can remind us daily from Whom our strength comes, Who enables us to go on the heights...

One of my favorite moments this past week was a comment the boys made. Kevin was playing a game with the kids where he shouted out a letter of the alphabet and they had to run around the house and collect three things that all began with that letter. The older 3 kids were super enthusiastic about playing, and even Noah was trying to keep up. So when Kevin called out "w", the challenge was bumped up a notch. After searching wildly for several minutes, Hudson and Eli ran up to Kevin carrying a toy snake. When Kevin asked what the "w" was, the boys responded with, "It's a wubber [rubber!] animal!"

The photos are of the family game of "horse" in the living room, the first day of school for the older three (I took them on the 3 wheeler rather than having them ride the bus), and what I found on Saturday morning upon going in their room to get the kids up--all of them on the top bunk under the covers with Karis reading to her brothers!

We're Back!!!

Probably anyone who USED to check our blog for family updates has ceased to do so--and rightfully so! I am so apologetic for the lapse in time since my last post. We have just gotten off of a whirl-wind tour of the US, and are just getting our feet on the ground as we try to re-align ourselves (our bodies and minds!) with life back in China.

So here's a re-cap of the last 2 months we had in the US, as well as a few of the details of things we noticed as we've made the leap back and forth between two cultures that are so vastly different.

The time in the States for us was GREAT! We felt like we were continually reminding ourselves (and each other!) to soak it all in--the clean air, the birds chirping in the trees, the grass we could walk on, the endless servings of chips and queso, and the precious time with friends and family who truly provide us with the "soul food" for which we long. We spent the first three weeks in Dallas, once of which Kevin's parents were in town from Florida for, doing doctor's appointments, purchasing things we can only get Stateside, and enjoying as many playdates with friends as we could possibly fit in. And let me tell you, we took "fit in" to a whole new level! There were days that we truly had 4 meetings with different people or groups scheduled. Our funniest was one day when we had guests over for dinner, but let them know beforehand that we would have to be brief because we already had another couple scheduled to come over right after we got the kids in bed at 8pm. (Luckily the dinner friends are really close, and didn't seem to mind being booted out early in the evening!) Some of the funny things that we realized were so different from China, mainly because our kids pointed them out, were water fountains (Noah especially was fascinated by this, starting at the airport and continuing on whenever he spotted one), wearing shoes indoors (our kids for the entire two months would immediately drop their shoes by the front door upon entering someone's house), walking on grass (Eli and Noah in particular loved this, both asking if they could take their shoes off to walk in it whenever they saw a patch of green around), families having two cars (they only know one family here in China who has their own car, so they were confused by why any family would want or need two), and drinking out of the faucet (Hudson continued to ask throughout our two month's stay--"Is it okay to drink this water?").

We had so much fun getting to spend time with people and do so many fun things, but the following week when we took off for family time in Colorado was also a little bit of a relief, as we had truly "vacation time" in the real sense--just time with family and no place else to go and nothing else to do. We had time with both of my siblings and their families, as well as with my parents, hiking and fishing, white water rafting and throwing countless rocks into the icy Colorado streams that flowed around us. We couldn't get enough of the cool mountain air or the aesthetic beauty around us. I have a friend who has lived here in China for 19 years who told me once that she thinks the Lord allows her the privilege to return to Colorado every several years so that her "aesthetic beauty tank" is filled up enough to endure the grit and the grime of the city in which we live--and I think I would have to agree! My continued prayer was that I wouldn't allow the beauty we were able to enjoy for a week to be a source of bitterness later when I had the opportunity to compare it to where we now live, but that it would be a place I could go back to in my mind and enjoy the beauty of His creation and getting to experience a piece of it for any amount of time. Karis, who just turned 7 in June, knows that I love the beauty of Colorado--and specifically the Aspen trees. You can imagine how touched I was when she and my mom gave me a gift after our week of vacation--a pair of silver-covered aspen leaf earrings that they had hunted for and (miraculously!) found while in Crested Butte to give to me as a reminder of my favorite place on earth. And to think that the idea was all Karis' (and I'm assuming the buying power all my mom's!), have made this pair of earrings a treasure beyond compare!

We returned to Dallas for about 2 days of play time with my oldest (meaning longest!) best friend, Amy Baker and her family. They were in town from Seattle and we were able to let the kids get as much play time in as was possible to fit into 48 hours (including slumber parties, of course!). Amy's 3 kids line up in age and gender with my oldest 3 almost perfectly (just a few months apart for each of them), making the friendships for our families really easy and natural. I can't tell you how many times we said prayers of thanks during our time in the States for how well our kids "coped" with the transitions--from staying in different places, to putting about 7,000miles on borrowed or rented mini-vans in two months, to being thrust into social settings with kids that they really didn't know--we were so thankful that they not only coped with it all well, but that they seemed to enjoy every minute and every new situation! We laughed at how they were having the time of their lives largely because every day was like Christmas for them--fun new places and things they rarely get to experience (even the simplicity of joyfully being able to go outside to a backyard when they want to, rather than having to wait for the whole family to make the time and effort to have the production of getting from our 10th floor apartment to the courtyard below). Kevin and I both recognized this as one of the great blessings that comes with the sacrifice--it is hard to see that our kids don't get to experience what we consider "normal childhood experiences", like playing in a backyard or swimming in a pool, as part of their daily routine, but it is also awesome to see how thankful they are and how appreciative they are for those little things when they do have them.

So after our quick time in Dallas again we headed off for our longest road trip--starting in Houston, then going on to two different places in Georgia and then to Florida. In Houston we again had an absolutely amazing time getting to reconnect with college friends and our best friends who formerly lived in Tianjin and had to return to the US because their daughter was diagnosed with leukemia. It was such sweet time of fellowship and encouragement, and so fun to have our kids develop friendships that seemed to run deep in a very short amount of time. After Houston we booked it to Warm Springs, GA to meet our best friends from baseball during the All-Star break at their ranch house. We had 3 days of the kids playing in the dirt, fishing, and picking blueberries at a farm. We sweated a TON and had a great time in the process! After our Georgia farm time we headed to a suburb of Atlanta, Fayetteville, to visit our best friends from our time at DTS. Again, we had an incredible 2 days of swimming, fellowship, and having the kids connect with dear friends whom they dearly miss!

After those two days, my husband set some kind of record for "best husband of the year" by sending me off to the Atlanta airport so that I could fly back to Texas for a girls' reunion weekend with a group of friends of mine from college while he drove the 10 hours by himself--with four kids ages 7 and under--to where his parents live in Florida! And he did so with JOY! He was so excited to have me have a retreat with girlfriends that he was genuinely excited for me to go--and my time definitely lived up to his (and my!) expectations. I was able to spend time floating down the Guadalupe River and enjoying meals with girls I hadn't seen in years, and was so refreshed and encouraged by their love and concern for me and my family and all that we've experienced as we've made the cross-cultural move to China. And Kevin (and all 4 children) totally survived the weekend and the drive without me! According to all reports, it even went well! Once I flew back to Florida to re-join the fam we had another full week of time on the beach and at the pool, soaking up the sun of Florida and the love of grandparents. We got to go to a wildlife preserve with tigers and lions only feet away from you on the other side of the fence and to the movie theater to see Cars 2 in 3D! We made the most of every moment, and even had the pleasure of Kevin's cousin and his family coming in town from North Carolina to have time with us--which my kids loved since they brought their two daughters, who are close in age to my little ones.

I'll be honest--our drive back to Texas felt long. We knew we only had one week left in the States and that was filled with dentist appointments and a few other things on the to-do list still before our departure. (Kevin decided his theme for his summer was "teeth", as he spent more time at the dentist than anywhere else! Right before we left China he noticed pain in one of his teeth that had given him problems before due to a basketball injury that took place in highschool! This pain ended up in 3 teeth being pulled and a permanent bridge being put in, as well as one additional root canal and the discovery of his first cavity!) We had to cut our road trip home short in order to get back to Dallas in time for him to have the remainder of his dental work completed before we left town. The one praise in the whole thing was how thankful we were that it happened when it did! If it had happened while here in China, we would have been looking at a TON of travel into and out of Beijing in order to get it done, and probably not done as well! So no complaints here, just not exactly how Kevin planned on spending so much of his time while in the States....

I've got to go get Noah up from his nap now, so I'll wrap up (we're a few days into China time and we are all making the time transition pretty well, but definitely trying to keep to a schedule with naps so as not to ruin the night time sleep!). As much fun as we all had while in the US, we have been absolutely thrilled to no end to hear each one of the kids say how happy they are to be back in China! It is an amazing testimony of His faithfulness that this place that is so foreign and offers so much less of what the world calls comfortable and convenient feels so much like home to all of us. They are certainly feeling the weight of not being able to go outside on a whim (Eli asks about 8 times a day when the next time is we are going out will be!) and not having the undivided attention of grandparents and an endless supply of playmates who speak the same language, but they regularly comment on how happy they are to be back home! We're headed to the international school this evening for a picnic with other families and a time of playing sports on the soccer field together. The older three kids start class this week on Thursday and Kevin has jumped back into his language study already (I'm taking another week off--and thankful for that decision as I look at the bags still left to be unpacked!). Off to conquer the jet lag.... :)

Where to begin?

I guess I should start with an apology for falling so far behind on our usual weekly updates! The last 3 weeks have been a whirlwind, complete with internet failure for a week, visitors in town (a true highlight!), and now a computer on the fritz that makes downloading photos impossible! So I suppose that leaves you with my written word alone until I can edit the post to add photos (maybe not for another 2 weeks until we are back Stateside?!). Again, another apology!

So since our last update, our family celebrated Easter with other ex-pat friends who live here and had a BLAST. Complete with Easter lunch and an Easter egg hunt, our time with friends was precious and a true memory-maker. The following week we celebrated Hud's 4th birthday and my 33rd! We had lots of cupcakes and friends over for different celebrations. Hud's gift theme showed how well everyone here knows him--a vast array of Trasformer figures, robots, and various weaponry! He was thrilled beyond words and we had a hard time getting him out of the house to enjoy the warm weather because he only wanted to stay in and play with all of his new stuff! Thankfully there are enough new toys to pass around to two brothers, as one in particular (Noah) has a difficult time understanding why everything he sees is not his the moment he lays eyes on it!

The first weekend in May we had a dear friend (Joel) come in to town to visit. He lived here in Tianjin when we first arrived, also a student at our language school, and instantly became a member of our family. He has since left to go back to Canada for a while, then returned to a different part of China to work. We had a great time reconnecting with him and even taking a trip to the beach (a drive that was supposed to be a total of 4 hours and ended up being over 8!) for one day. We also made it to another teacher's wedding, arriving about 15 minutes late! We left our house in plenty of time to get there (so we thought), but hit unbelievable traffic, taking us about 45 minutes in the taxi to go the probably 3 miles to get there. The worst part was, rather than waiting until the service was over or being able to slip in the back row like we'd do if we were Stateside, they actually held the wedding ceremony for us until we arrived! Talk about embarrassing! Guess when you have a family of 6 (and then a guest in town, too), we kind of make a scene where ever we go! The bride didn't seem miffed at all, for which I was extremely thankful.

After Joel's visit we had a day to wash the guest sheets and towels to prepare for two of Kevin's dearest friends from baseball to come in town. Bryan and Mickey came for a week to help Kevin coach the baseball team he works with here in town and connect with some people in Beijing. It was an incredible visit, totally encouraging to us as a family and really helpful to Kevin as he is looking to deepen the relationships he has within the baseball community here in China. And they came with a bag full of treats! Fun stuff like flavored coffee creamer for Kevin and me and toys and candy for the kids. They wisely decided to spread out the gift-giving so that the kids got a little something each day--and talk about feeling like it was Christmas again! The kids (and Kevin and I) were truly sad to see them go.

So we finished up the week with a little more chaos. Kevin's wallet was apparently pick-pocketed from him while he was sleeping on the train on his way back from the Beijing airport. Of course it had both credit cards, his ATM card, driver's license, and a good deal of cash in it since he was traveling; but we were thankful that they didn't get his passport, at least! We've been scrambling this week to figure out how to quickly get new cards, etc., so we're not left high and dry here in China! And we hosted another one of our usual monthly movie nights for a group of friends this Saturday. We had about 12 people over for dinner and to watch "Blindside", which was a huge hit. We had good conversation afterward and are hopeful that the movie watching will lead to more future conversations with our friends.

We in the throes of preparing for our return to the US. And can't believe it's only 2 weeks away! The list of things yet to do continues to grow: finding a bunny-sitter, getting school payments made before leaving town, etc., but our anticipation is growing and we're super pumped to see our friends and family, eat some good ol' American cuisine (and Mexican, Italian, etc.), and breath some clean air!

Lots of People--Not Enough "Stuff"!

So when you live in a country of 3.1 billion people, and a city of an estimated 9 to 11 million (depending on who you ask), there are bound to be some repercussions to such a large number of people and only a limited amount of resources (not to mention space to fit everyone!). We got to experience that up close and personal this morning when we helped host an Easter egg hunt for a group of our Chinese friends. A good friend of mine here (who also happens to be a Texas A&M grad--whoop!), Natalie, had the idea of hosting a hunt for our local friends and then having a picnic lunch afterward. She did a ton of work in prep, and had her mom, who has just come in town from the US for a visit, bring over lots of Easter goodies. So between the two of us, we showed up at the courtyard outside of her apartment complex this morning at 9:30 with probably 150 eggs with candy and 4 dozen or so hard-boiled, decorated eggs. Natalie also had prepared party favor-type bags, with "hot commodity" items of which she only had a limited number (things like extra-large plastic eggs that each had one big bag of candy in them or a toy, large bubble wands, small containers of playd0h, etc.). I didn't ever do a head count, because the number of people present seemed to be continually changing based on how many neighbors passing by decided to stop in and join our party, but at any moment there were between 15 and 25 kids involved.

The plan was to have one of our national friends first go through the story of Easter with the Res Eggs that are so popular in the US, then have the kids hunt for eggs themselves, conclude with a pizza lunch and then send everyone home with a bag of party favors to kind of even the playing field as far as the loot that each kid would return home with. Good plan--or so we thought! After we waited for everyone we were expecting to come to actually arrive (which was closer to 10:30 rather than our scheduled 9:30 start time, which is not a-typical in a culture where time is definitely NOT valued like it is in our western one), it started very quickly to feel like we were being swarmed with both parents and kids buzzing around to see what goodies were available to be snatched up. Before we knew it, the party favor bags were being sifted through and stuff being taken out, bubbles blowing in the wind as kids would carelessly grab one, spill the bubble solution, and reach for another without any thought of how few there were or any mention from the parents that maybe this was not the best option. In the US, I've often heard of Asians as being pushy or selfish, for example pushing ahead of you to get on the elevator or invading personal space while waiting in line. I have to be honest, and say that yes, this is one of my bigger challenges of patience in adapting in this new culture; but I also see how deeply this is ingrained in literally pretty much every person I seem to meet here! If you don't push to get on the elevator, you're not ever going to get on. If you aren't up on top of the person in front of you in line, someone else is going to cut in. And the person cutting in line is not rude or selfish, rather they are seen as shrewd and wise for taking advantage of the opportunity to do so. We truly are fish who cannot describe the water in which we swim. There is not a Chinese person I know who can identify this reality--it is just a part of who you are as a result of living in place with such an incredible amount of people with such a few amount of resources available!

At one point, the friend I had invited noticed her son had taken his second bubble wand out of the box that Natalie was helplessly trying to guard, and she asked me if it was okay that he was taking another. Not really knowing what to say, and not wanting her to be embarrassed, I told her that my friend had intended that each child take one bag home with them at the end of the party, stating that she only had a limited number of the items in the bag and emphasizing that we wanted each child to get one. I'm pretty sure that the problem was not a language one, but the mother's response left me standing speechless. She looked at me and smiled awkwardly, saying, "My son wants to have two." My thought: "Of course he does! But who is the parent here? And what about all the other kids that would like to have one?!" Instead of speaking these thoughts aloud, I looked at her with my eyebrows raised and just smiled weakly. There was absolutely nothing mean or challenging in the way she responded, but Kevin later described it (I think accurately) as more of a kind of helpless plea for understanding. Her child wanted two of the bubble wands. Who was she to tell him "no"? And thus the main parenting problem we observe here--commonly referred to as "the little emperor syndrome", where the child is the ruler of the home. He calls the shots. What he wants, goes. If he wants candy for dinner, he gets candy for dinner. If he wants to be held until he goes to sleep, he is held until he goes to sleep, regardless of what sacrifice that means on the parents' (or more often, the grandparents who are raising the child most of the hours of the day) part. it's amazing to me, and exhausting, as I watch with such sadness how the children get away with murder while the parent stands by--either looking helpless and beaten or angry and unpredictable in how they are responding to their child's inappropriate behavior.

So in the case of my friend, we're still analyzing exactly what was going on as far as why she wouldn't just say, "oops! Didn't realize there were so few bubble sticks!" and return the one her son had taken. But we do know that "saving face" here is the name of the game, and when you're embarrassed, you definitely don't want to acknowledge and wrongdoing (by yourself, or in this case, your child), but instead kind of try to just avoid the topic or situation. In looking back on it, I'm not sure if I should have handled it differently, maybe not pointing out that her son was really only supposed to have one bubble wand? The side of me that longs for justice wants to scream, "Boundaries! Have them! Enforce them--for everyone's sake!" But in the long run, is a bubble wand worth potentially hindering a relationship or an opportunity to extend love and grace to another? I wish I had the answer! But I do have a feeling that I need to have a plan, as I have NO DOUBT that such situations will arise again--probably in the near future, as there are so many kids and parents that seem to interact the same way; and we plan to continue to have interaction with our Chinese friends and their children!

So on a different note, Kevin and I had the joy of another date night tonight! We had 3 jr. high and high school girls come over to watch our 4 and took off with 2 other couples for dinner. We ate at the Pizza Hut here that is close by; a first for me since our move here over a year and a half ago. What I found so funny was the rigidity in ordering. Kevin wanted to order a sausage pizza, but that was not an option on the menu. There was, however, a sausage and shrimp pizza--which he was not excited about. So he asked the waitress if he could just have the sausage and shrimp pizza with no shrimp. Her response--no can do! If he wanted to take the shrimp off he would have to pay a significant amount more money--in spite of the fact that he was choosing to NOT have the more expensive topping! Crazy! So then our friends we were eating with told us of one time recently (also at Pizza Hut) that they tried to order plain cheese pizza. Again, the waitresses response--no can do! They apparently didn't have cheese pizza as an option! Hmm....a pizza place without pizza or cheese to put on top....not sure exactly how that one works... :) Thankfully, we were all able to laugh about it (rather than be frustrated by the rigid thinking--and ordering), and we enjoyed our Hawaiian pizza instead!

On our way to the taxi after dinner, we saw another couple obviously on a date. They were riding bikes side-by-side, and holding hands in the process! Wished I'd had my camera to capture the moment!

Up the Nose

Our spring break finished up really well last week, in spite of a few close calls! I just finished telling a friend last week that I had been incredibly blessed that with 4 kids going through the toddler stage, we have not had a single incident of choking on toys or sticking small objects up the nose (or in an ear, etc.). Well, I obviously was speaking too loudly, because we had two incidents of objects of the nose within 3 days!!

After a fun day on Thursday of playing with friends and dog-sitting for a neighbor's dog (as seen in the photo) on Friday, our family met with another family (the Thorpes) who also have 4 kids a little older than ours (you've seen their pics before on the blog, as they are our kids favorite friends to spend time with here!). We met at the baseball complex which also has a track with a grassy area in the middle--completely free of doggie poo or huge masses of people! Our kids LOVE to go there and run, hit the baseball, play frisbee, etc. And to make it even better, it is walking distance from TGI Friday's--our favorite comfort food get-away! So after enjoying an evening of playing outside in beautiful temperatures and then eating burgers and chicken fingers (with honey mustard, of course!), we were doing our usual routine of hailing a taxi where Kevin is out in the street trying to wave one down and I have all 4 kids either by the hand or them with their hands on me. As soon as Kevin got a taxi to pull over, he turned to motion us out to join him in the street, and Hudson stepped off the curb without even looking; he was only centimeters away from being hit by a slew of electric bikes that were flying by at that moment! We all screamed, Hudson immediately began sobbing, and it took several minutes before any of our heart rates returned to normal. We were reminded again of His protection and how incredibly different safety is here in China! There is literally not a single moment that you can let your guard down, even when on a sidewalk, as cars and electric bikes frequently traffic even designated pedestrian areas. Also, the sheer number of people in constant motion coupled by the fact that traffic laws are merely suggestions rather than things that actually require being followed or receiving punishment if not make transportation and safety one of our continual biggest concerns. After the close call, Kevin and I both agreed that after many months of thinking through the subject, we both feel confident that purchasing a car for our family this fall is the best and wisest decision we can make.

Seems like a no-brainer in a lot of ways, but we've found the subject to be a slightly touchy one here in Tianjin. Would you believe that out of all the western families we know here, literally only 1 owns a car? We think it's largely because of the sub-culture within each ex-pat community in different cities. We know of two other cities (Beijing and Chengdu specifically) where almost every ex-pat family does own their own car, but that is just not the norm here in Tianjin! There are some obvious reasons not to purchase--there is not market for used cars, so it's not a good investment and requires purchasing a new car rather than an old one; the driving here is a totally different "style" from Stateside driving; if you can't communicate well enough verbally and an accident does take place, you're kind of out of luck. But the upsides to this family of 6, particularly in regards to safety and moving around during the long winter months have finally pushed us over the edge! So I just might be trading in my motorcycle-type 3 wheeler for a large mini-van come fall.... :)

After Hud's close call, we returned home to put a tired crew to bed, only to race into the bedroom at Hudson's panic-sounding cries. We discovered, as he choked out through frantic sobs, that he had stuck a Perler bead up his nose (a small bead you use in crafts)! We were able to get him to calm down and finally blow his nose hard enough to dislodge the bead, but both Kevin and I remain baffled as to what causes a youngster to try to fit an object into such a facial opening?

So after that, I got a text from Kevin on my cell phone yesterday while I was at a coffee shop studying stating that he had just removed 3 BB's (small plastic ones that the kids find outside) from Noah's nose using a pair of tweezers! Again--totally confused as to why all of a sudden this seems like a good idea! He was unaware of Hudson and the bead up the nose drama from this weekend, as we took Hud out of the bedroom and worked on him in the other room immediately. Maybe the fresh spring air is getting to my boys?

Speaking of Spring, I am including a photo of the cherry blossoms in bloom right now. We are LOVING both the aesthetic beauty and the sweet aroma that fills the air--so stark in contrast to the normal scents and the gray of winter that is finally lifting! We're getting outside as many hours as possible, trying to soak it all in and enjoy every moment we have of beautiful weather and no long underwear!

Last night, Kevin had a first. he went to dinner with Sam and one of the baseball players to eat hot pot (like fondue). Their menu--frogs, cow throat, and cow stomach lining! I asked Kevin how his own stomach was doing last night upon his return, and was surprised to hear that in spite of feeling a little queezy, he was actually doing okay. I guess we're getting more and more accustomed to some of the strange things we are ingesting these days?!

The night before last, our whole family had an interesting dining experience. Our landlord, who lives in England and I have never met before, showed up at our front door on Sunday afternoon! I was totally shocked and embarrassed, as our house was just about the messiest it has ever been! The boys had been building Legos all morning--so they were spread ALL over the living room floor. Noah had been playing with all the cars, racing them through the entire entryway, which was covered with cars and trucks. Karis had all of her dolls and animal figures out in different "houses" from her play time that morning in the kids' play room. I had been folding laundry, so had about 10 piles separated all over the guest room. You get the idea.... And then, we'd had the downstairs windows opened the night before, but unfortunately a dust storm had blown in, leaving a fine covering over all the floors and every surface area of the apt! I had done a quick cleaning that morning before we headed out to church, but it was far from well-done! So I got to take our landlord and her daughter from room to room, with them inspecting how "well" we'd kept up her house over the last year and a half of living here! To my surprise, she didn't seem disappointed or upset about the mess at all, and swore she'd called and e-mailed in advance before just showing up at my door (which I wonder about...). We were able to set a meeting time for the following night for us all to go to dinner, with the assumption (on our part) that we would negotiate our lease, which is up this summer.

So it was another cultural lesson for the Joseph family. After making it through an hour and a half dinner, with the kids doing surprisingly well in the situation, we left the restaurant not making any deals at all! But in spite of no contract, no money or terms even being mentioned, I think we still made forward progress. In China, it is all about the relationship--and we definitely bonded more than I thought we could have! The kids warmed up to our landlord and her daughter right away, which took me by surprise, as I wouldn't have described either as being "kid magnets" during our initial meeting. And before we left, our landlord told me 3 or 4 times not to worry, being very vague, but I think implying that we would work out the details of our rent and that she wanted us to be able to stay. She's even offered to come over this week or next to teach me how to roll jiao zi! Kevin told me on the way home how proud he was of me, knowing how difficult it is for this Type A person to hold back, wanting to get the negotiating started and one more thing checked off of my list! Again, so much to learn and so many opportunities to be stretched out of my comfort zone!!