Chinese Halloween

I must say, this year's Halloween was much different than last year's! On Friday night, we met with a group of friends from the international school to divide up into groups and go trick-or-treating. The kids had fun dressing up (although the group was put together at the last-minute, so we didn't have much time to prepare; just went with the easiest costumes that we had available!). So Karis dressed up as Fancy Nancy (from the book series), Eli was a kung fu fighter, and Hud was a baseball player. Noah was either a farmer or a train conductor (he just had on cute stripped over-alls!). The kids had so much fun going from apartment to apartment here in our community to teachers and other international school families who had volunteered, making about 7 or 8 stops in all. It was really neat to be able to celebrate this way here. I struggled with whether or not to "celebrate" Halloween each year in the States, because I felt that the dressing up was so fun for the kids but the holiday itself was definitely not something we wanted to promote in our household. However, here in China, there is absolutely NO frame of reference for Halloween; so it truly is what you make of it! We were able to talk with the kids and explain the difference in this holiday and the others we celebrate (which all focus on our faith in one way or another); but also be able to tell them that we can still have fun and enjoy the aspects that are not so "dark"! I think they got it, but maybe they were just excited to get to dress up and go ask people for candy!!

The difference in this year and last--last year we did have a fall Harvest Party with our homeschool group--which the kids loved! But I also ended the time of celebration by falling down our last two stairs and landing on the hard wood floor to end up with a broken bone in my left hand. So thankful that this aspect of Halloween ended up very different this year!

Hudson's quotable from this week: after watching the movie "Alvin and the Chipmunks" that was passed on to us by some friends, he clarified that the little animals were not squirrels, but rather chipmunks. Then after a moment of deep thought, he asked, "So do all chipmunks like Christmas?" (The main action in the movie centers around Christmastime!) I thought this was pretty cute, and wondered just how small of a separation there is between reality and fantasy in the mind of a three-year old!

Kids Being Cute

This last week was a fun one for everybody--once we got over the minor stomach bug that circulated throughout at least some of the household! After Kevin and Eli recovered, I had a brief bout with (I'm assuming) the same bug that the boys had, but bounced back after missing only one day of class. We were able to resume normal weekly activities, and everyone even made it to International Day at TIS, where Karis performed with her 1st grade class (they were focusing on South Africa this year). It was so cute to see her dressed as an American (in her jeans and bandanna around her neck) amongst all of her classmates from different countries. The boys also wanted to get into the dressing-up, so we convinced them to wear their baseball uniforms (rather than the Kung Fu outfit Eli really wanted to put on, but was eventually convinced really had very little to do with his own home country's culture!)

The photos are of Karis during the performance and of the three oldest kids with Ms. Barbara (also dressed up for a performance), their surrogate grandmother here in China with G-Ma and Nana so far away.

We went to the park with another family on Saturday and endured several well-meaning Chinese grandmothers and their insistence that the kids were not dressed warmly enough, that their pants were too thin, and that Noah needed to have on some sort of body suit to ensure that his mid-drift did not get cold, thus resulting in a tummy ache for him! (Can't say I handled the badgering with as much grace rolling off of my tongue as I probably should have... Probably good that I'm still pretty limited linguistically as far as what I can say!) We had several Chinese friends over for dinner and a movie on Saturday night, and then taught the kids' SS class again on Sunday and had time to rest and study.

Each of the kids had a cute "something" this week that I thought was worth mentioning (at least for the grandparent's sake, right?!)

• Noah--walked across the apartment to come find me in the kitchen (while doing dishes) with Bo (the bunny) suspended in mid-air by Noah's clinched fists holding onto the fur on his back! Noah was excitedly squealing, obviously pleased by the fact that he had managed to open the rabbit cage, remove the small (and frightened!) animal, and make it to my said location. All survived without injury (except for me, who's heart definitely skipped a beat!).
• Hudson--discovered the best place to warm his hands during a cold ride while on the back of a bicycle is his mom's bare lower back (under her jacket and shirt)! Mom, however, is not so sure that maybe just wearing gloves isn't a better solution...
• Eli--introduced a new term to our family. After hearing me use the word "queasy" while talking to Kevin to describe how I felt on Wednesday when I came down with the before-mentioned bug, he tried to mimic this new addition to his vocabulary, saying, "Mom, I felt squeezy too on Sunday."
  
• Karis--at school, she uses a small piece of lined paper in order to write her spelling test each week. (As you can imagine, in a world where Chinese characters are the main form of written communication, there is not much need for lined paper, making it therefore a little hard to come by. So she's not totally well-practiced in this paper's use, and the pieces of paper themselves are quite small.) Since she is unable to write all 12 words down one side of the paper, the teacher has the class make two columns, with the numbers 1-6 down the right-hand side and 7-12 down the left. Karis has evidently gotten confused about this layout, however, and when she writes the numbers down the right-hand side of the page (rather than down the middle of the page), she ends up writing each of those words backwards. For example, this week's paper looked like this:

ekil 1.
edir 2.
elims 3.

I thought it was so cute and impressive that she could see the words backwards as well as forwards that I considered not correcting her, but decided that not encouraging any dyslexic habits was probably a better long-term decision. We'll see what next week's test holds!

Where Am I?

I had another one of those, "Where am I?" moments on Friday. I was riding my bike to meet a friend after class when I came upon a sight not totally abnormal here in my "new normal" of China. There was a huge, rough-hewn broken tree branch sticking about 4 feet out of an open man hole--in the middle of the street. Now this was not a small, two-laner, but rather a wide (no lane markings, of course!) road, and right at a spot where another smaller feeder ramp was merging, no less. Let me tell you--this would have won no "safety awareness points" at any place in the US. I passed by this makeshift Road Hazard Sign and had to chuckle at the sight, while at the same time lifting up a quick prayer than none of the thousands of cars that probably whizzed past every day would meet the open man hole with the large stick head-on.

I had a few more minutes left on my bike ride before I arrived at my friend's home (I had planned to help her go shopping in her local market, as she wanted to pick out a sweater for a friend, but wanted another opinion on which one to purchase. Jumping ahead--we ended up finding a neat Liz Claiborne one (one of those samples-that-fell-off-the truck), and I even hit the jackpot myself, buying 4 sweaters for a total of under $25! I may complain about how hard it is to go shopping and buy stuff here in China, but when you find a good deal, you REALLY can find a good deal!) Anyway, I had fun reflecting on life here and how many changes we've seen in our 13 1/2 months. I read a remarkable passage in Hebrews 11 this last week that really challenged me, especially in light of our quickly-approaching trip back to Dallas in December. The specific verses are 13-16. "If they had been thinking of that land from which they had gone out, they would have opportunity to return. But as it is, they desire a better country, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared for them a city." (v. 15-16) It has reminded me again of the tension that exists between enjoying where He has put us here on the earth, being okay with having "homesick days" for Dallas, and keeping in mind that no physical location here is truly "home". No matter how much I may miss Cheesecake Factory or Raising Cane's chicken fingers, eating my favorite foods, going to my favorite places, even seeing my favorite people does not make Dallas home! My heart is to be longing for another home, a permanent one, in order for me to live in such a way that others see that hope for what is eternal and can delight in Him along with me! What an awesome calling. And how true it is for each one of us--not just those of us living across the ocean as literal "aliens" in a foreign land, but for those of us still planted in the same town in which we were born and raised. Oh, for His grace that this truth may be a reality in our lives!

So after the shopping trip with my friend, I got to have an even MORE exciting day by having a date night with my hubby! We joined two of our dear friends here, Sam and Charis, who we have been blessed to have in Tianjin now with us for going on two months. We introduced them to one of our favorite restaurants, Thai food, and then walked to a Starbucks at a nearby shopping area.

On Saturday, Kevin and I traded off on having time with the kids, as he had a paper to write and I had a take-home test to (supposedly!) complete. He took the older three kids hiking at Trash Mountain for a few hours while Noah took his morning nap, but unfortunately came home with them feeling puny. By Saturday afternoon, we ended up canceling our Sat and Sun evening plans, as it looked like Kevin was coming down with the full-fledged flu. Luckily, he is perkier already (it is Sunday night), and only Eli has caught the bug. So we're REALLY hoping that it stops there and the rest of us can escape the joy of stomach issues!

The photos are how the kids pass the time when we have more indoor time than normal--Eli doing pilates along with a DVD that we own, and then all 4 of them watching a movie while I fixed breakfast on Sun morning (on the biggest stack of pillows they could manage to make!).

Funny Dream and Unforgettable Weekend on the Wall

I woke up laughing on Thursday morning, but feeling a little bit tense at the same time. I was remembering the dream that I had just had--one which I found very telling of my emotional/mental state right now. I had a dream that we were with our group of western friends here in Tianjin (the same ones we were planning to go out of town with that morning for a weekend getaway to a nearby village) and were on a boat. One of the women with our group got motion sickness, so the boat driver decided to pull over at dock at a nearby village. We all disembarked and found a HUGE Super Target awaiting us! We had 5 minutes to run through the store and make whatever purchases we deemed most important before the boat departed to continue on our journey. I awakened before hitting the check-out line, but remember passing by the aisles with pet reptiles (frogs in particular; I'm assuming this portion of my dream was linked to the reptile section of the animal selling part of town we had taken my mom to earlier that week here in Tianjin) and decorative vases as I tried to determine what was top priority! I suppose I'm thinking of our return trip to the States in December more than I realize!

We left town (by van, rather than boat) on Thursday morning after breakfast and drove about two and a half hours into the mountains west of Tianjin. We arrived in an 800-person village (called Ji Xian) to our accommodations for the weekend--a bed and breakfast-like place at which our group had reservations, thanks to one of the families having stayed there on a previous trip. We had the entire second level rented out to our group, since there were about 22 of us that had come together (and one dog). Our family had three rooms; one for the kids, one for Kevin and me, and one for my mom. When we first arrived, I immediately thought, "Hey, this place is great. This reminds me a lot of some place we would stay at in Colorado during a family vacation." Once I said these words aloud, however, I realized the humor and irony in what I was saying! Yes, we had three rooms (which is a lot, technically), but the rooms were each barely large enough to have enough floor space to include a bed or two and then a small walking path between them. Yes, we had three bathrooms, but none of them included a toilet (only squatty potties) or a "real" shower or bath (only a shower head right next to the squatty potty). Yes, we had enough beds for everyone, but the mattresses were so hard, that we all ended up piling up anything extra that was soft that we could find to pad under our hip bones (for those of us who are side sleepers). Yes, we had a beautiful view off of our balcony to see the mountains when the haze wasn't too thick, but the gap between the bars was large enough for a 16-month old to easily slip through and plummet to the ground two floors below. And yes, there was bedding for the beds, but there were no towels or even toilet paper provided (luckily, I wondered if this would be the case and therefore brought my own from home!). So our place DID end up being great (and cost the equivalent of about $15 per night per adult, kids free, and cost including 3 meals a day--all Chinese food, meaning mainly stir-fried veggies and rice!), but my initial assessment of being similar to Stateside accommodations was probably a bit premature!!

In spite of a few "accommodation obstacles", we had an absolute BLAST these last three days, and decided we would return to the same spot (and same bed and breakfast!) again in a heartbeat. We hiked the Great Wall for several hours on Thursday, with only one minor tumble by Eli that was remedied by a band-aid and some Neosporin (the Wall is a LOT steeper than I had ever imagined, having really steep inclines and declines that have stairs at some points and not at others; also, the Wall is a little bit on the old side, so it is quite uneven footing! These elements make for more treacherous climbing than you would envision when thinking of a hike through mountain paths.) Kevin had Hudson on his back and I had Noah on mine, so we both got an extra quad work-out in for the afternoon! We crashed early that evening after our kids and their friends (another family with us who are dear friends also have four kids, ages 15 down to 10, who our kids LOVE and even babysit for us some times to have a date night) did a lip sync performance to different music (Veggie Tales, "Where is My Hairbrush?" by the Joseph clan)--complete with sock puppets that the other kids had helped ours design and color. On Friday we went to a site that was about a 10-minute walk away that the Tianjin International School owns, and at which we had gotten permission to hang out. They have built a huge ropes course there, and the site has a large area of grass (with no police present to tell you to get off of!) as well as other team-building activity dynamics (like a really large see-saw that multiple people can get on at once, a cowboy golf course, a rock-climbing wall, and lots of rocks just the right size for my boys to collect and throw)! We spent the morning there playing with our friends and then went horseback riding and picking apples at a nearby orchard in the afternoon. The kids had a movie night that evening before bedtime while the group of adults had some meaningful fellowship time together. Talk about sweet friendships and fun memories being made! And to have my mom with us for it all was even more significant, as she has really gotten to know some of our dear friends here and built friendships with them on her own. We were so thankful to have such a refreshing weekend out of the city, playing in the "clean" dirt of the village, speaking lots of English with our friends and watching our kids have the time of their lives playing with their friends in such a beautiful spot in nature. Oh, but we must admit that we did all enjoy the hot showers, sit-down toilets, and soft beds we returned home to last night!

I unfortunately had to escort my mom to the Beijing airport this morning for her to catch a noon flight back to Dallas. The tears flowed, but not nearly as much as usual with our upcoming Christmas reunion just around the corner! And after a WONDERFUL 10 days of having her here, I am feeling refreshed and encouraged, ready to tackle my Chinese studies (that have been slightly put on hold during our week-long holiday!) and get back in the swing of things in our new normal. Oh, and I did have a funny realization this weekend. I have been gearing up for the cold weather to set in, but was thinking we only had another week before our heat was turned on. Not so! I was off by a whole month! The heat comes on NOVEMBER 15 rather that October 15--so bring it on! I'm thinking I really do need to pull out the long undies and fleece pj's!!

Greatest Friday Ever!

This past week was an emotional one for me. For whatever reason, I just kind of hit a wall and felt really lonely and isolated! I was so excited that we had a whole week of "vacation" to look forward to, as it is a national holiday here in China that ends up giving us a weeks' break from school for us and the kids, and really wanted to plan some fun activities for us to do during the hiatus from our normal routine. I kept trying to have these talks with Kevin to coordinate schedules and see how much I could get him to agree to as far as hosting other families--mainly western ones that we just rarely spend much time with. [We try to spend as much time with our national Chinese friends as we can; since we only have so many free hours in a week, that means we just don't get a ton of social time in with our western friends here a lot of the time. But something has got to give, right?] So what I've realized is this: while I have been sooooooo blessed to develop several really meaningful relationships with Chinese friends here, I still really depend on the time with my western girl friends in order to re-charge and get refreshed. Most of my time with my Chinese friends ends up as a "pouring out" time; which I absolutely LOVE, but also end up feeling really drained as a result of (not to mention the time element--which here in China, means spending 3 or more hours together at any given "hang out" time as the norm.)

So try as I might, I could NOT get Kevin to agree to all of my well-laid plans for social time with a few other families. I finally broke down in tears on Wednesday night, and might even be found guilty of saying a few accusatory statements like, "You aren't helping meet my emotional needs!" And, "I'm not the same as you as far as what I need socially in friendships!" Kevin handled the remarks and my tears well and gently, with a few chuckles along the way; but I was remarkably surprised that he did absolutely NOTHING to make any changes! (Normally, if I have an "unmet need" that I express, he is super fast to jump in and come up with a plan to see how he can help correct the situation so that I am happy and therefore the family is firing on all cylinders!) I went to bed feeling down and a little confused at his response.

On Thursday, we revisited the conversation again. This time with me expressing confusion at how I felt he had genuinely heard my woes, and yet had not done a thing to help me out. His response: laughter! He eventually just threw up his hands and said basically, make whatever plans you want and I'll just go along with them! So still confused, I planned. I set up a playdate with another mom and her two kids to come over to our apartment on Friday for lunch (when I knew Kevin would be out of town for a meeting he had in Beijing) and then decided to walk to a park with another mom and her 4 kids Friday evening for a picnic dinner there. The plan was for Kevin to come straight from the train station to the park on Friday night when he got back in town.

After a GREAT playdate with my friend Natalie and her two little ones on Friday morning, Kevin and I kept in touch throughout the afternoon as to his progress on his trip and when he thought he would make it back to Tianjin. Around 7pm he let me know that he was in the taxi and headed our way. He showed up at 7:15 and informed me and the kids that he had gotten balloons for them, but that they got to come pick them out. We walked down the path away from the playground area to discover the balloon vendor heading our way on their bike with about 100 balloons tied on the back--only the balloon vendor was no normal Chinese vendor. It was actually my Mom! She and Kevin had coordinated about 2 months ago for her to come in for a surprise visit and spend the week with our family! The kids and I were absolutely shocked and speechless! (Well, Eli wasn't so speechless. He immediately let Nana know the game he was playing with his friends--trip tag--and the rules so that she could join in the fun.) Hudson wanted to know if Nana rode the bike all the way from Dallas. Noah couldn't take his eyes off of the balloon-covered bicycle, and Karis just kept repeating, "Nana, I just can't believe you're HERE!" It was pretty precious all the way around. And as understanding of my husband's odd response to my emotional needs not being fulfilled dawned on me, I had to laugh at the irony. Here I was, thinking I knew what was best and what I needed, and all along he had a plan in store that was so much better than anything I could have asked for or imagined. What a great picture of a much bigger one...

So our week thus far has been fantastic. We played baseball with some of our Chinese friends on Saturday morning and then ate dinner at TGI Friday's that night. Our adventure on the way home included the battery on my three-wheeler once again almost completely sputtering out on me. Kevin insisted on switching places with me, so that I was riding his bike with Karis on the back (and wearing Noah in the Ergo carrier in front of me--a first for me to bike with two kids in tow!) and he was pedaling the three-wheeler up the incline to get home. After we made it up the hill, Karis and I waited for Kevin to arrive. My mom was slightly ahead of us with Hudson on the back of her bike. Karis started urging me on to hurry so that my mom and Hudson wouldn't "win" the race that we were apparently in. I explained to her that we would win the prize for being the most considerate, since we were waiting for Kevin and Eli to make sure they made it home safely, too. So when we got home, the boys took baths while Karis worked on some artwork. She designed individual "awards" for each of us in the race. For me, she drew a picture of a person with the word "nice" printed on it (because we were considerate and waited). For Nana, she drew a picture and wrote "You win!" on it (because Nana was the first to reach home). And for Kevin, she simply wrote, "You tried!" (because he, naturally, came in last place, but had to put forth great effort to even complete the event)! As we all compared our awards after we'd put the kids in bed, we found her artwork quite clever indeed!

We had a relaxing Sunday of going to church together (where we got to hear Kevin share about a 10 minute testimony during the service), and then going to eat lunch at the just-opened Subway sandwich shop. Talk about exciting! As far as I could tell amidst trying to run down Noah (I'd failed to bring his stroller to strap him in and there were certainly no high chairs to be had at the restaurant) and coerce the other kids to eat a few bites after having lots of snacks during the church service, the sandwich tasted even better than what we have Stateside. It's funny how I used to consider Subway only gas station/fast food type eating, and now consider it fine dining and a special treat! Oh, how much things change in a year... :)

On Monday we braved the throngs of people and went shopping at a really popular part of town. We took the kids to H&M--a total God-send of a clothing store here in China. It is truly the ONLY store I've found in China that is at all similar to anything we're used to in the States. We were able to find clothes for the kids (much needed after growth spurts and a much longer than expected winter last year, both taking their tolls on our kids' winter wardrobes!) and even a sweater for me. My mom then found a few gift items she was looking for to bring back upon her return to the States next week :( We tried to make the shopping experience fun for the kids, eating lunch at Papa John's pizza and getting McDonald's ice cream for dessert. Each of the kids got a cone with swirls of different colors. Our favorite was Hud's green swirl cone--kiwi flavor! Who would have guessed that such a combo exists?

On Tuesday we had fun exploring around our apartment community, showing off how well the kids are riding their bikes and playing tag outside with Nana (after doing lots of craft time in the morning, thanks to the loot that Nana brought with her from the US!). My mom and I took off on a "date" while Kevin watched the kids, and we ate lunch at one of my favorite spots here in town. We came home in time to fix dinner for two of our dear Chinese friends who were coming over to join us that evening for food, fellowship, and a chance to hang out with "LaoLao" (grandmother)!

Today has again been laid-back with lots of good family time. Kevin ran errands, buying a new battery for the three wheeler and making a trek across town to pay our five-months' heating bill so that it can be turned on when the start dates comes around (Oct. 15), while my mom and I played outside again with kids. My mom reconnected with several of our neighbors who remembered her from her previous visits. They were most concerned with who was at home taking care of my dad, and how I was going to take care of the 4 kids when she leaves this weekend to go back to the States. One neighbor was so excited they even ran home to get their badminton set, a game they'd played together during her last spring-time visit here! We are LOVING the beautiful weather that allows us so much time outdoors! Our ayi came over this afternoon with her college-aged daughter and taught my mom and me how to cook several of our favorite Chinese dishes. We had a great time learning and laughing in the kitchen! And I'm hoping that I can pick up a thing or two and be more adept at preparing Chinese dishes for our friends when they come over!

Tomorrow is our big trip. We leave in the morning to join several other families for a trip to the Great Wall, where we will spend two nights in a bed and breakfast-type place. We plan on going on a several hour long hike tomorrow afternoon (with the two youngest guys in backpacks) and maybe getting to pick fruit at an orchard and go horseback riding! The spot we're going to (called Ji Xian) is pretty new to us, as we've been only one time and for a very quick visit. But it's supposed to be a great place to get away and explore outdoors, and the friends we are going with are super-fun to spend time with, so we're expecting it to be a great time for all! (Even in spite of the fact that it was suggested we bring some extra padding for the beds, as the mattresses are more like wooden planks than the beds we're used to!) Sure there will be lots to tell...