1 year, 5 months, 18 days

Before we moved to China, we were told during one of our training seminars that it takes 15 years or longer to begin to "break in" to a new culture. After this last week, I'm beginning to think that we are on the "or longer" track! Although we've lived here in Tianjin for almost a year and a half, I'm am still absolutely amazed at how much we have to learn about the cultural differences between China and our western thinking.

Last weekend Kevin's friend Leif came over to our house (which is a normal weekly occurrence). During dinner, he casually made the comment that one of his co-workers had a friend (whom he had never met personally) who had asked if each time Leif came over to our house, he could bring this friend of his co-worker's with him so that she could practice her English. Kevin and I immediately started chuckling together in unison, then quickly realized with shock that Leif was NOT laughing with us! We exchanged surprised glances then began back-pedaling as fast a we could--asking what he thought about this request. He shared that he understood and didn't think it at all strange--in spite of the fact that he was a regular guest and dear friend of our family and he had yet to meet this other friend of a friend! Thus the Chinese emphasis on relationships (their word is guanxi); a concept that truly lies at the core of this culture and what they value most. This prompted a long discussion on how the concept of guanxi works, and how a person can ever fulfill the obligations that come with these closely tied relationships. In China, you don't make friends quickly or without much consideration, as once you are "in" someone's inner circle, you are committed to do pretty much anything for them that they may ask (such as borrowing money, doing all sorts of inconvenient favors, etc.). While Kevin and I have been aware of the significance of guanxi, the thing that surprised us the most is how wide these circles can reach. The fact that a friend of a co-worker would make such a request, based on a mutual friendship, was truly shocking for us both (and scary at the same time, with Kevin and I both wondering how many friends of friends might call us up wanting a trip back to the States, etc.!!!). So we have lots to learn. We still haven't figured out exactly how all of this works, but are just beginning to see the complexity of the matter....

After the guanxi conversation, as I was clearing dishes, Leif and Kevin were looking at the recent addition of new photos to our refrigerator. Leif told us that he, too, had put photos on his fridge, but that our family's picture was "right here"--indicating the upper right hand corner of the fridge. Kevin and I, once again exchanging surprised glances, questioned the significance of where our family's photo was located. Leif explained (after much prompting), that the upper right hand corner was the most valuable position for the photo to be! Kevin, quickly scrambling to re-arrange our photos so that the ones with Leif were also in the upper right hand corner, explained to Leif that we had not previously had such a hierarchy of photo arrangement, and that we were thankful he had enlightened us! But it has left us wondering--are we going to be scrambling to re-arrange the photos now every time we have our friends over whose pictures also happen to be on our fridge?

The other two things we learned about culturally that night from Leif had to do with Chinese traditions. One is that his mom told him he was not allowed to get his hair cut during the 15 day celebration of Chinese New Year. The consequence of doing so: his uncle would die! The second (after seeing Karis' gaping hole in the front of her mouth and discussing the tooth fairy of the US), was what Chinese people do when they loose their baby teeth. If it is one of your top teeth, you throw it outside on the ground, thus ensuring that your top teeth will grow down out of your gums properly. Likewise, if it is a bottom tooth, you throw it up on the roof, ensuring proper growth up from your gum line!

So for whatever reason, after our short time away in China, the cultural differences seem to be rolling in more heavily than normal, and leaving us feeling slightly frustrated and irritated more than we usually are. (I must admit to feeling downright angry when I was in the elevator and the lady next to me hocked the biggest lugi I've seen right at my feet. It took all I had within me not to drop a , "Come on! Could you really not wait 30 seconds until we got outside to do that?!" But hey, this is China, not the US, and the cultural norms are just NOT the same. And I'm the one living in THEIR home country, so I know it's my job to humble my heart, bite my tongue when necessary, and recognize that different is not always bad (except maybe for the spitting thing; I can't see that I'll ever really see that as "good"!)

So my goal: the next time I go to E Mart to buy diapers and wait in line for one hour (well, maybe more like 55 minutes) while having the other people in line literally looking all through my basket to see what the foreigner is buying; the next time I ride my bike to school and play chicken on the way with all the taxi drivers who think the bike lane is better used as a passing lane for them; the next time I see a little kid with crotchless pants peeing in public at a store entryway, I can remember why I am here and how much I have developed a love for these people who have so graciously and patiently welcomed me into their world which is so different from mine!

In the meantime, I praise Him for bits and pieces of familiarity. For our Valentine celebration of decorating sugar cookies with friends (as shown in the pic) and of beautiful snow falling (and even warmer temps these last few days--all the way up to 50!).

The other pics are taken the last day of the Chinese New Year celebration after the lantern festival. On that night we had firecrackers and fireworks going off literally non-stop from about 3 pm until after Kevin and I went to bed at 11 pm. The thing I didn't take into consideration as we listened to the war going on outside of our windows--the clean up the next day that was required (and handled incredibly efficiently, I must say, with huge crews of men and women all over with large brooms)! So I suppose at this point we're down to about 13 1/2 years until we really start to get it.... But who's counting?! :)

Will try again....

Wow. Talk about frustration hitting a maximum! I've been feeling totally swamped in trying to catch up on life this week, but "things" keep seeming to happen that slow me down! I set aside all last night to FINALLY catch up on the blog, and after spending well over an hour, it all (except for the first word!) disappeared into cyber space. Zenme ban?! (That means, "what can you do?!") So here we go again. Rather than going as in-depth as I had on the last one, I've lowered my goal to at least get you all caught up on the last three weeks we've been away from the computer, and then will have to follow up with details from this week hopefully later this week!

So in an attempt to justify my truancy from Chopstick Rookies, I'll back up to Jan. 18, the last date I posted a blog update. That night, I came down with horrible flu-like symptoms. After 3 days of total misery (with me feeling like death warmed over and unable to get out of bed and Kevin managing his usual load PLUS all the extra kid/home/school duties for the kids), we decided it was time to head to the international hospital in Beijing and get my body some help! Kevin had a speaking engagement that morning at the international school for the elementary kids' chapel service, so while on his way, he managed to get friends lined up to watch kids and a driver arranged to bring the two of us into Beijing. Thankfully, the trip only took about 2 and a half hours, and I spent the rest of the day getting pumped with all sorts of stuff through an IV (anti-nausea meds, ibuprofen, and finally antibiotics). After running tests we discovered that my illness was NOT a major bout with the flu, but rather a bacterial infection that had most likely come through something I'd eaten (so food poisoning!). What was almost as big a bummer as feeling like my body was absolutely going to shut down on me was the fact that I'm pretty confident that the food culprit was the Subway sandwich I had eaten for lunch the day I'd gotten sick! Talk about disappointing when one of the major tastes of home you can get is all of a sudden marked off of your list of possible comfort food options (at least until I forget about the misery it caused!)!!

So while we were at the international hospital, the cultural differences between Chinese medicine and western medicine still shined through! When we first arrived, my fever was at 104 and I was trying to keep down some cold water (which felt great on my parched throat). But in China, you're not supposed to drink cold water, especially in the winter! So I was totally fussed at by the nurse. And in fact, I'm pretty sure that she marked somewhere on my chart that the cold water must have been the cause of my condition rather than the bacteria I had ingested from bad meat!! Then when they brought me some Tylenol to take, the cup of water they handed me was hot water! I had to laugh a little as I tried to choke down the pills with water that was almost to warm to swallow comfortably!

After being treated all day, the doctor felt fairly confident in the diagnosis of the food poisoning, but I still had a fever and had only had the antibiotics in my system for a few hours (and I have a history of being somewhat resistant to different forms of antibiotics for infections). So rather than going back home to Tianjin, he recommended that we spend the night in a nearby hotel so that if my symptoms got worse, we could quickly return to the hospital. [He also gave us the option of spending the night in the hospital, but said that we wouldn't be getting treated, just observed, and it would probably cost us around $4000! He was pretty confident we could find a hotel that suited our preferences for cheaper than that.] So as I finished up my treatment, Kevin walked around the neighborhood and found a hotel. I found it ironic that the week before I had told a friend that I was having a itch to try to find friends to watch the kids and have Kevin and I be able to get away to a hotel for a night--away from the usual routine, early morning wake ups by the kids, and responsibilities you feel when at home. So I did get my night away with my hubby, but after 3 days of eating only 1/3 of a banana I'm pretty sure I was not the engaging companion that makes a fun trip like that as fun as it could have been! Talk about slightly different circumstances than I had imagined!

The antibiotics did work their magic, and by the next day I was able to walk around some and we headed back to Tianjin to the kids, arriving by early afternoon. While we were gone, the kids had a blast! We had two friends pick them up from the school bus and bring them home (Sam and Charis), then they went to another family's house (the Thorpes) to play and eat dinner, then another friend came over and had a sleepover on our couch (Barb), and then Sam and Charis came back the next day with lunch and to relieve Barb in watching the wild hoodlums until we got home. I'm pretty sure the kids didn't even know we were gone! We can't begin to express how thankful we are for the "family" we have here who are so willing to go above and beyond to serve our family. We are truly blessed beyond what we could have asked for or imagined!

So after we returned from Beijing I had several days to finish preparing for our trip to Thailand. Our company has an annual conference there for its employees that involves times of fellowship and training.

Our time in Thailand was amazing! We had fantastic teaching and time connecting with others, and to make it ever better, some of my family was able to come! My brother-in-law, Rob, and sister, Sarah, headed up the kids program for the whole week we were there. And they brought along my mom and their little 18 month old, Ben, too! So while we were in meetings for 7 hours a day, they were in charge of entertaining and keeping alive 31 kids between the ages of 1 1/2 and 17 (with several other helpers, too). They did an AMAZING job, and were thoroughly pooped by the end of the week! While having them there was a blessing beyond words, I must admit that the sweetness also left a bitter taste as we returned to China this past weekend and were reminded of how difficult the separation is from those we love so dearly. I have shed more than a tear or two this week in that capacity....

But on a lighter note, one of my favorite memories from the week was Noah and his response to the natural beauty we were surrounded by while in Thailand. One of Noah's favorite past times is to have someone hold him to look out the large windows in our apartment and look down (we're on the 10th and 11th floors of our building) on the world below to see what is going on. Being such an industrial city, Tianjin is spotted with tall smoke towers from the factories, that billow smoke out most of the time the factories are up and running, adding to the lovely pollution problem that stains the image of China (and our lungs!). Whenever Noah spies one of these towers, he frantically points with his hand and starts puffing air out of his mouth in quick spurts until you, too, acknowledge that you are aware of the smoke stack. So the first day we were in Thailand (and throughout our time there), Noah looked up into the sky, spied a fluffy white cloud in the clear blue sky, and started huffing and puffing away! It didn't take us any time to realize what he was thinking--that this cloud was another smoke stack--and we realized that he not only can't see the sun easily, but also how rarely he sees clouds due to the haze that covers the sky from the pollution! We tried to teach him the difference between the cloud and smoke, but not quite sure his little 20-month old mind is catching on yet!

So now we are back in China. The cultural adjustment has been harder than we expected. Man, what I wouldn't give for a backyard or a place for my kids to run out and expend some energy in for a few minutes while I finish getting dinner on the table! When we returned from the States, I think we had prepared ourselves mentally and emotionally for the adjustments back into a foreign country, but for some reason they seem to be felt more a month and a half later as we return from a more brief trip internationally. I'm off to help get the boys down for naps, but hope to return to the keyboard later this week with more tantalizing tidbits about our cultural realizations and how they continue to grow...

"...forget not all his benefits."

I had another western friend share something with me this week that has really gotten me to reflect on some of His many benefits (as Ps. 103 points out). My friend told me about someone from the States coming to visit them. After living with them for a week and walking a few miles in their shoes, the gentleman shared with them some notes he had taken during his visit--notes compiled of things he noticed that our friends had given up as sacrifices in order to live in China. The second list he had was of the blessings and benefits that they had from doing so--and believe it or not, this list was much longer than the first! As my friend told me of this experience, I reflected on how true that is for our family as well. Having just come back from the States, we still have the taste of things we miss on the tips of our tongues. The ease of transportation, the joy of spending hours with friends and family we deeply miss, chips and salsa.... And yet the benefits are literally innumerable!

One of the biggest is the time we have together as a family. While most wives in our age and stage of life are doing well to have their husbands get home from work before they put the kids to bed, at least for now, Kevin is an incredibly active participant in our whole family's daily routine--even watching the kids regularly (three times a week) while I am in class. While this was an enormous challenge for him in the beginning, we laugh at how his "tolerance" for chaos has increased, so that he can now handle all 4 of our rambunctious little ones with a grace that leaves everyone around us in awe!

The photo is of their latest adventure. Kevin is taking the kids through a series he's putting together from Proverbs, complete with rescue stories and the super hero costumes that are some of their favorite Christmas presents. With three boys in the house, you can count on swords, shields, and other weapons being interwoven throughout their adventure that moves them around our apartment. It is such a joy to see them learning--and loving doing so!

Our week has been one of getting back into the routine again--at least for a few short weeks before the huge Chinese New Year celebration begins. The beginning of February marks the start of the Chinese New Year (according to the lunar calendar)--and the partying is unlike anything you've ever seen! The closest comparison is Christmas in the US--but I'm not sure that that is even on the same scale. Already the lines in the supermarkets are UNBELIEVABLY long (I waited for over half an hour today) and the gift and specialty items they sell this time of year are all over the place. I've started stocking our freezer already, as I discovered last year that pretty much everything shuts down for a few weeks around the New Year, making it impossible to find some of your basic cooking supplies (like chicken, believe it or not!). Being the veteran ex-pat that I now am (ha! ha!), I'm learning from our bare kitchen shelves and fridge last year and trying to plan ahead as much as I can so we'll be ready as much as possible!

One of the most challenging things for us here in China is how rapidly things change. I would not call myself a particularly adaptable person, but was definitely well-prepared during a lot of our training for cross-cultural living that our typical Western long-term planning just doesn't work when living in another country. I'm amazed at how true this is! We've been here a year and a half, and already our language school, the Tianjin baseball team, our church, and possibly the kids' international school are all changing locations--as of this fall! Oh, and our lease is up this summer and our landlord is wanting to sell the apartment, so there's a good chance we'll be moving as well! In Dallas, this would be an inconvenience. In China--this means a HUGE life change! Because of the monumental challenge of transportation, where you live and the places you have to go to regularly truly define how you spend your time, who you spend time with, and how much you can do in a day. I must admit, while I feel like I'm learning to depend on Him more and more each day, the thought of such dramatic change can kind of make my stomach hurt if I dwell on it too much.... Back to Ps.. 103 and forgetting not all his benefits... and super thankful that we have One who is unchanging on whom we can depend!

This week has been largely uneventful. Karis had a blast this weekend getting to Skype with her dear friend Adah in Houston, even playing games like Hang Man and TicTacToe for over an hour. We are so thankful for the technological advances that allow us to stay so closely to loved ones so far away! Hudson went on a lunch date today with Kevin and me to Subway restaurant and was just happy as a clam getting to have a double chocolate chip cookie for dessert! It's amazing how little things can delight a child's heart! Eli got to ride the bullet train with his kindergarten class into Beijing and then eat at McDonald's--a highlight of his week for sure! Oh, and the tooth fairy visited Karis again, as she lost her third tooth. Noah is still being Noah, with his newest word being an English one--"shoot"! (He loves to use the Nerf guns with his brothers to play good guy rescue games.)

Kevin is going out of town for the weekend to the place that is farthest on the globe from any body of water! He has gone out to this city in western China once before to bring baseball equipment to a young man who has organized a youth league that focuses on a minority people group and allowing them the privilege of learning the game. This same guy has asked Kevin to go again and help train him in how to coach some of his teams and some of the other coaches. Kevin has agreed to go, in spite of the fact that we learned that the temp is supposedly a high of 32 degrees BELOW zero! Thinking Kevin's long underwear might not be quite thick enough....

After a conversation or two with this guy, Kevin felt a pressing desire to go and try to help out. Would you believe that because of the cold, the teams are practicing indoors in a facility that this guy has secured, but they are unable to use regular baseball equipment (not sure if it would hurt the facility or the little equipment they have?). So this guy and the other baseball players have been making PAPER BASEBALLS for them to use during their practice! Can you even imagine?! Great reminder of all that we have and are accustomed to getting in the way of material things... And Kevin is really glad that we happen to have whiffle balls and a few other pieces of equipment that will hopefully aid in them being able to play some "real" baseball while he is there. I'm sure I will have some stories to tell after his return (both from his trip and the adventure of me and the kids surviving the weekend without him!)

Phenomenal Pep Rally

We've made it back across the ocean, and even with the jet lag and being exhausted from the travel, I can still honestly say that our time in the States was great. As Kevin and I have reflected at night before our heads hit the pillow around 8pm, we've decided that our time with friends and family was an incredible blessing, and felt much like what I would describe as a pep rally. It was a time where we were able to share what we've seen happen over the last year and a half of being here in China, and we felt tremendously encouraged by everyone to continue running the race. Kind of a slap you on the rear and "go get after 'em" again sort of feel to it!

So here we are, once again far from the ones we dearly love, and yet totally at peace and re-energized in spite of the fatigue that comes from jet lag and trying to see too many precious people in too short a period of time. As I sat on the bus on my way to class today (as the high today was right at 30 and Kevin strongly advised I NOT ride my bike in the cold!), I reflected on how incredibly blessed I feel to have the peace that I do right now. I've thought for some time that I had to cut so many ties with who I used to be back in my "Dallas" life if I truly wanted to plant my heart and my family here in China. But I'm thinking maybe that's not the case now. And not that my previous thinking really had that much you could externally observe as far as my actions were concerned, but it was more of an internal battle; a heart struggle to identify my "new identity" as Ailian (that's my Chinese name!). So while the tension does still exist somewhat, and no doubt will as long as I live in another culture besides my native one, I'm optimistic that rather than having to die to who I was and develop a whole new me, I can actually have two cultures in which I exist, and even thrive, different as they may be. As I rode the bus and watched the interactions of those around me, I was struck again by the incredible darkness around me; the dire need for hope of so many in this huge city (and country). What a blessing I have been given in this invitation to come and live abroad, in spite of the sacrifices that some days feel like they are really heavy to bear!

Now if you talked with me on Saturday, our day of travel from Dallas to Beijing, I might have been singing a different tune. After only an hour of sleep during our 24 hours of travel, I was definitely hitting my physical and emotional limits. At the airport in Seattle (our stop over city on the way to Beijing), I thought about pulling my hair out at the gate clerk's response to our request for an extra seat in which to put Noah's car seat (we hadn't purchased a ticket, but hoped that there would be an open seat available on the plane for us to claim). In spite of the fact that there were plenty of empty seats in our uncrowded flight, the attendant insisted that when she flew with her child she never used a car seat, and therefore we should not use one, which meant that we did not need an extra seat (so we would only have 5 seats for our family of 6). Kevin FINALLY convinced her that we did not need to wait for her supervisor to come and make the decision, and was able to sweet talk her into not only ONE extra seat for Noah, but also an extra seat near us, so we had a total of 8 seats for the 6 of us! PTL! But I must say, I certainly looked at Kevin a time or two in the process and told him I wasn't sure I was ready to return to the cultural differences of China and the "cookie cutter" thinking that is the norm.

On a lighter note, here are some of our highlights from our trip to the States that showed us how long we've been gone:

• the kids couldn't figure out how to use a paper towel dispenser with a pump in a public restroom, as you don't find paper towels (in public) of any sort in China
• the kids see any sort of green growing stuff as something they can trample through--even if that means our friends' bushes! (here they so rarely see green, that when we do, we usually try to play in it some before we're told by someone not to do so!)
• Hudson couldn't figure out a drive through when we went to Sonic to get a corny dog
• Karis had forgotten what a corny dog was!
• NO personal space rules that our kids knew to follow
• whenever we entered a house, the kids immediately looked for where to take off their shoes
• we all had more stomach issues adjusting back to the rich US cuisine than we've ever had while here in China eating typical Chinese food!

The photos I've included are of Eli and Hud with their buddy Will at the playground, Karis in Houston with Kevin in me with a group of our friend's kids there at dinner one night (where it was warm enough to eat dinner outside--amazing!), Karis with her friend Adah who is battling leukemia when we went to feed the ducks, Noah listening to my iPod on the flight back to China, and Karis in the Seattle area play area (which was surprisingly great for the kids!).

Our time back to Texas could not have been better, and expectations couldn't have been more surpassed. We're only excited now to see what this summer will hold for our second return trip to the States!!

Merry Christmas!

It's Christmas morning here in Dallas, bright and early as the effects of jet lag have obviously not completely worn off of this traveler as of yet! The Joseph family has been in the States for almost a week now, and we are LOVING it! The flight over was as good as could be expected. Friends keep asking, "So what do you do on the plane for that amount of time (11 1/2 hours from Beijing to Seattle, then another 4 from Seattle to Dallas, totaling about 24 hours in travel from the time we leave our apartment in Tianjin and arrive back at my parent's house in Big D)". My answer--"I'm not really sure!" But somehow we all make it in one piece, with sanity mostly intact, and the kids even all managed to sleep at least a little. We were very thankful for an airplane that had individual screens at each seat to pick your movie or music. Kevin and I did decide that maybe we've been in China a little too long after Karis and Eli both first picked to watch Xi Yang Yang (a Chinese cartoon, in Mandarin, of course!) rather than any of the other English movies or short-programs!!

After a long night's sleep at my parent's house (and having to awaken several of the kids at 11am!), we met with my two oldest friends and their families (the Bakers and the Campbells) for brunch and play time. Noah awakened at my parent's house to look out the window and utter a huge "Whoa!" when he saw the grass, the blue sky, and the yard to play in only separated by the window pane in front of him. And then he met their chocolate lab, Josie, and the state of ecstasy was complete! We practically had to tear him away to get him to our friend's house--where again, he resumed his state of ecstasy! The kids can't get enough of being around their favorite friends and family members, of being able to run inside and outside to play (without having to bundle up or go down the elevator to get there) without even needing adult supervision, of riding around in the mini-van and car seats (which, surprisingly, all of them are LOVING!). Their questions and comments keep us in stitches. Hud's most frequently asked questions are, "Mom, where are we now?" and then secondly, "Where are we goin' next?" It's so cute to see his three-year old mind trying to wrap around what all is happening around him. But I am so thankful that as much as he seems slightly confused, he isn't bothered by the constant change a bit, but seems to enjoy every "new" experience that he is having. He has also asked a few times why Mr. Du isn't driving us around in his van (our Chinese friend who we hire when the whole family needs to go into Beijing for an airport run or doctor's visit)!

Our time with friends and family has been so sweet. We were sooooooo encouraged by our friends from our home church when we were there on Sunday. They had us share a little bit about our past year and a half in China, and we were so humbled and blessed by their genuine concern for us and our family, for wanting to hear the details of our "new normal", by the hugs that we received, and by their desire to help us as we "stock up" on some basics before we return to China in two weeks (like socks and underwear that don't have too many holes in them!!) We then spent almost three days at my relative's ranch out in the country of central Texas, where we got to ride four-wheelers (that we keep calling three-wheelers, since that is our main form of transportation in TJ!), feed a camel, throw rocks in the creek, roast s'mores, find and collect all kinds of treasures (including some fossils), go coyote hunting, and even shoot their first guns (my dad helped Eli and Hud shoot a .22). They had a ball, and it was so refreshing to enjoy the clean air, the warmer weather, and the sweet time of fellowship as a family.

We had one day upon our return from the ranch before Kevin's family came in town from both coasts, and the thing that Kevin and I keep commenting on is how much we can get done here in just 1 day! We were both able to run a bunch of errands AND spend time with friends we dearly love. My parents were gracious enough to watch all 6 of their grandkids (ages 6 down to 9 months) for us to go out to dinner with my brother and sister and their spouses. We had a much-anticipated meal at Chuy's, my favorite Mexican food restaurant in town, and then coffee at my sister's coffee shop. The cousins all had a blast playing together--we're amazed at how quickly they have become good buddies already!--and the 6 of us grown-ups had a great time visiting over chips and queso...And I'm hoping it won't be my last bit of TexMex before heading back East!

I'd better run to fit the last few things in the stockings before kiddos are up and at 'em, but will sign back in later with more reports from the "West"! Love to all of our dear friends back in TJ, and hope that we can bring some of the Texas warmth back with us in a few short weeks...

4 Days Away!

How do you know when you've been in China for a while?

• you find your 6 year old designing "passports" rather than normal artwork with her friends who are over
  
• you find yourself asking more frequently where someone found their Christmas wrapping materials than where they bought the actual gift from
• your idea of what is in style is based on what doesn't have holes in it and what is clean (and dry!)
• you have a large display of very-fake looking flowers displayed in your living room, courtesy of a national friend convinced that the purple and yellow matched perfectly with your existing colors (none of which are close to purple or yellow!)

So this sums up our past week! We have been busy packing and preparing for Dallas, talking about what things we remember and trying to get them all straight in the mind of a three-year old! A challenge, indeed!

On Wednesday evening we all went to the international school to watch Eli's class perform. They had put together a little scene of Bethlehem, complete with his class playing a real Israelite kids' game (as seen in the picture) and singing.

Saturday morning I came in from washing dishes to find Karis seated on the couch with all her brothers around her, reading them library books she had just gotten! It was a sweet moment, but also made me realize how much she (and all the kids) are growing up!! On Saturday at lunch time, I went to join a group of western ladies that I meet with every other week for a time of study and encouragement. We had a great time doing a cookie and soup exchange (including recipes), and then swapped gifts. It was fun and refreshing to celebrate with such dear friends! Saturday afternoon I spent preparing fruit, tea, appetizers, salad, apple cider, and dessert platters filled with cookies that I'd been baking all week. We had about 12 Chinese friends come over for a Christmas party, complete with Christmas pictionary, a movie and discussion time, pizza for dinner, and a candle light service. It was quite possibly our most fun monthly gathering we've had yet--and everyone seemed to have a great time! Karis even added a special moment by reading a passage from Isaiah and singing a song she learned at school that corresponds to the verses.

On Sunday, we rested! At our international fellowship, Karis performed with her class, leading the congregation in some Christmas carols. While the younger kids took naps, I got our suitcases packed. Believe it or not, I have all of our stuff in 4 bags--and only two of them have clothes for us (one is full of gifts and things we're bringing back and the other is stuffed with duffle bags that will no doubt be filled upon our return to China, as my list is SUPER long of stuff to buy while in the States!). So if you happen to see us more than once while we're in Dallas, you can count on us being in the same clothes... So while we're packed relatively lightly, we are bringing back a bunch of luggage for our friends who are in Houston while their daughter undergoes Leukemia treatment. So the mystery of the week is how we are going to fit 11 full-size suitcases and 7 people (6 Josephs and one driver) into a 7-passenger van! I think we're going to have to get creative... and definitely have the kids and us piled a few people high in each seat!!

So I'm signing off for now. If I don't make it back on to update this week, then the next post will be from Stateside (only 4 days and counting....)!!!!

Cold Tianjin!

Only 11 more days and we'll be boarding the plane for our first trip back to the States! Wow! It's truly amazing how time is flying by... and I'm sure the busyness of the holiday season is adding to how quickly the time is passing. Not busy like Stateside-busy, but busy trying to see friends and do some holiday celebrating with those that feel Christmas is an extra-meaningful time. That being said, it's gotten really cold here! We had another cold front blow in last night, so our high today is in the mid-30's and the wind makes it feel much colder. Kevin took off on his bike to class this morning, but after walking the kids the 1/2 mile to the school bus and passing the frozen water on the way, I'm thinking taking a taxi sounds more enjoyable...

Thursday evening was one of our two "China adventures" for the week. After teaching the older two kids kickball during their after-school sports time, Kevin took Karis and Eli with him to one of the baseball player's homes for dinner. The player's dad teaches English, and it ended up being somewhat of a recruiting dinner for Kevin! Seems as if his dad would like Kevin to come teach English also to the kids at the company he runs, so he lavished our kids with gifts (mainly junk food snacks), a full meal for dinner, and even stuff to take home (like a coffee or tea french press, fruit, etc.). Kevin and the kids had a good time, but was unfortunately a later evening than I'd hoped (they didn't get home until 8:30, which is about an hour and a half past their normal week night bed time!). Made the weekend start off a little behind on sleep patterns, but was a good time for Kevin to show love to his young baseball friend!

Friday night Karis had her elementary school's musical performance. It was precious, and she had a blast. Two of our good Chinese friends and a two of our western friends came to cheer her on, so she felt like a star! We made it through the whole hour-long show, only having to leave with Noah once to go run around outside in the foyer, thanks to the fun upbeat music that Karis' younger brothers had fun clapping along with (oh, and a small bag of M&Ms that I packed in the diaper bag!).

On Saturday we went to the international school's annual Christmas bazaar. We had a great time shopping for some fun Christmas things that are hard to find elsewhere (like small Christmas gift tags, poinsettias, even good-quality kids' toys for cheaper than normal import prices). The highlight for the kids was them each getting to pick out a toy--Barbie doll for Karis, hot wheels for the boys, and Fisher Price phone for Noah. None of them cost over 30 kuai (the equivalent of about $4-$5. Believe it or not, this is incredibly rare for us to find such deals! Most people assume that since we live in China, and this is where everything is made, you can find toys for REALLY cheap. Not so!!! We can find really cheap stuff at local toy stores, but it literally lasts for at max a day or two before a crucial part breaks off and it all ends up in the trash. Pretty frustrating! And the one down side to the toys we did bring home was the amount of dirt on them! They were brand new, but I still had to thoroughly clean most of them (that were not fully covered in plastic) to get off all of the dirt and grime. Needless to say, we are looking forward to Target and ToysRUs and doing a little stocking up for this next years' birthdays when we are back in Dallas this month...

Saturday afternoon we had another "China adventure"! My precious friend Shan Shan invited us to come to her family's home for dinner over a month ago. Her mom is significantly older, and her father passed away early this fall. So Shan Shan and her mom have been preparing for our family coming over for over a month, practicing piano and singing duets, finding out kids' menu preferences, etc. We arrived at 4:45 pm on Saturday afternoon to find snacks out and waiting--all just at the right height for Noah to grab easily--including 3 kinds of cookies (one a seaweed variety--yum!) and a plate full of small chocolates. After Kevin and I attempted to keep him away from the chocolates until after dinner, we eventually gave up, realizing that there was no way we could do so without both offending our host and causing a total scene with our incredibly strong-willed 1 1/2 year old. So Noah had a total blast. He emptied the first plate of cookies, much to my relief (thinking, "oh good, they're gone so now he won't eat any more!") But our hostesses were too on the ball, so the supply of chocolates was quickly replenished. Long story short, Noah's dinner on Saturday night was chocolate. Literally. He ate at least two plate-fulls, (maybe 3?), and had a few cookies for dessert. But when it came time for the meal at 5:45, for some reason he just wasn't interested in green beans! Our hostesses were slightly surprised, so Kevin and I just laughed it off. We're still trying to figure out if Chinese families do this with their own kids (the whole, feed them snacks and sweet stuff just to keep them happy even if it's right before meal time), or if this is just something that happens when guests are over. Have yet to determine the cultural norm....

The dinner was a feast. Shan Shan and her mom had fixed 16 dishes--that's right, 16 different dishes--for us to eat. And there were only 6 adults (my friend Ying Ying and her boyfriend also came). We ate more than we had room for and then they sent us home with a fridge-full of left overs. I'm attaching a photo of the mini-concert that we got from ShanShan (on the piano) and her mom (singing). It was a sweet time of fellowship and deepening relationship with a dear friend, in a culture in which spending time with someone's family is one of the most significant things you can do to show you care for them.

Sunday after fellowship we hurried home to have one of our favorite western families (the Thorpes, also with 4 kids, ages 11-16) over for lunch. The Thorpe kids have kind of adopted ours as younger siblings (which thrills my kids to no end!), and they had gotten some gifts for our kids for Christmas. So we had a meal together and small gift-opening time. After a quick afternoon rest time, Karis' school teacher came over to babysit the kids for Kevin and I to go out on a triple date. We went to a famous hot pot restaurant with our friends from Dallas (Sam and Charis) and one of Kevin's former teachers and her fiance. We had a wonderful meal (at the price of about $7 per person!) and a great time talking over dinner. We are soooooo thankful for the sweet friendships we've been blessed with, both foreigners and nationals, that we have to celebrate with already this year!!