Parties and Travel

one of the many manholes

my "monkeys" at the zoo

It’s spring, and we’re making the most of some beautiful weather and a somewhat more relaxed schedule to get out and about—and to have some parties!  We turned a trip to the import store into an exploration of a new place to play—the former zoo that is now a public park.  I don’t know why we hadn’t been told of this one before!  The kids were nuts over the places to explore and climb; the green grass and the open sidewalks took my breath away.  It helps that this time of year everything is in full bloom, so the foliage is a stark contrast to the white concrete that is the predominant eye sore around town.  Besides the numerous open manholes, the kids were in sheer heaven climbing around on what I think was the former monkey island!  No one even minded that the construction on the roads around the park turned the 20 minute drive into about an hour both ways, and I got my shopping done and some good, clean air and exercise into my active kiddos who have been certainly experiencing some spring fever.  I’m not sure if I’ve never noticed it so much before because I’m used to them being in school during most of the hours of the day, but man, have we had a lot of extra energy and wiggles that daily need to be burned off!

That's right--an Aggie jacket in our courtyard!  Whoop!

bball in our courtyard

I’m thankful for Eli’s tendency to have a goal in mind for himself and issue a challenge to his siblings to pique their interest in also pursuing the same goal.   He’s been doing that as of late with exercise; after I’d pointed out that one of his best friends is in charge of taking the trash down from their 6^th floor apartment daily to the outside trash can (no elevator in their building), he’s decided that doing more stairs is good for everyone.  So he decided that he, too, would take the stairs rather than the elevator each time he can.  He also asked me if I’d be willing to bribe/reward his siblings with two jelly beans (still a bit of left over Easter candy around here!) if they would run the stairwell with him.  So the kids have agreed to regularly go from our 8^th floor apartment, all the way up to the 14^th floor and all the way back down to the ground floor and then up again to the 8^th—and they do this either 4 or 5 times round trip!  You’d better believe they come in the front door huffing and puffing!  I usually stand near the door with it propped open to yell some words of encouragement and be ready with water bottles so they don’t have to slow down too much.  (Of course, it’s got to be somewhat of a competition; I do have 3 boys who have had their dad model a competitive nature!)  I figure that with the number of calories they must be burning, two jelly beans are a small compensation for me to make for their hard work! 

Hud's bday dinner out w kabobs...

...and mint brownies for dessert

My bday coffee date w Eli

We’ve also had a few birthdays and other memorable occasions to celebrate.  Hudson turned 9 years old on May 2.  We had a family dinner, along with some of our best buddies out here who were hanging out with us for several days while their mom was in the hospital.  His friends’ presence made the family celebration (and the birthday brownies) that much sweeter!  His other request was to celebrate by going out to the mountains and doing a fellowship time with a group of friends there.  It was such a sweet outing!  We loaded up a huge van that we rented and 3 other cars and had a group of 30 of us make the one hour trip to one of our favorite places in China.  We spent the day visiting, singing, and charging up the sides of the mountains.  It was such a sweet celebration!  And then my birthday was a few days later on the 5^th, and we had a family dinner out at a favorite Central Asian restaurant with a few friends able to join in the fun.  I also got to enjoy another fun treat—coffee with Eli!  He’s become quite the coffee lover (when we allow him to indulge on rare occasions), and one of the coffee shops nearby has started carrying decaf coffee (at my request!).  So I’ve got a favorite coffee shop now which I’m frequenting more regularly!  (In the past, none of the coffee shops had deca,f which makes it really disappointing to meet someone for coffee in the evening when I know that drinking some would affect my sleep.)  The one other big celebration was for Kevin.  He’s been working so hard at his language learning that we just HAD to have a party for him—complete with one of his favorite desserts that isn’t made often (there are too many ingredients that I can only get when they are sent in a US package).  He’s been memorizing in the new language he’s studying, and the amount that he’s memorized has me standing back in awe.  The man has a mind that is truly gifted for this sort of thing, and I’m so thankful for his diligent perseverance; he’s set records, I’m sure!  And the time and effort he’s putting into it are being used in a mighty way.  Much to celebrate there!

too much walking for Noah

in ChengDu

We took a trip to another city in China, ChengDu, for me to attend a homeschooling conference there.  It was so helpful!  Although I’ve been homeschooling the kids now for two years, I’ve never attended this sort of conference.  As Karis is getting into middle school (she’ll be in 7^th grade starting this fall), there are things that I just don’t want to miss and have her fall behind in required courses, etc.  So I thought it was a good time to talk with other experts on the matter and also find some encouragement along the way (as I can honestly confess, is needed on many days!).  Kevin hung out with the kids for the 3 days that I was in meetings, and they had an absolute blast!  The first day we arrived we took them to a sporting good store that has really great quality stuff for reasonable prices.  The kids each got to pick out either roller blades or scooters (the older got the blades, the younger got the scooters).  The place we stayed ended up being such a surprise blessing; I found it online and we almost didn’t book it because it was inexpensive and was only 3 stars.  We thought it might be a total dump, but it looked like there was  a pool and I knew that would be a total treat for the kids.  It ended up NOT really having a pool, but it was in this fantastic area perfect for rolling around; it was basically an apartment in an area with a huge courtyard with gorgeous blooming flowers that looked like a European plaza of some sort.  And there was a Starbucks and 7-Eleven right around the corner (the 7-Eleven had donuts and Dr. Pepper!!!).  The city of ChengDu is WAYYYY different from where we live, so we took advantage of all the perks—wide sidewalks (so we’d walk everywhere to dinner if it was within an hour’s range or so), Tex Mex, movies in English, Papa John’s, and an Ikea (where I could stock up on a few basic home things, even fitted sheets, that we just can’t find elsewhere).  We left after 4 days feeling refreshed from the break in our routine and excited about the new things we had to bring home.

buying chicken 

picking a cut of meat

It’s amazing how every time I pull away from our “usual” routine and environment I find myself doing some major processing about our life.  We’re almost 7 years into China being our “new normal,” and yet I still find myself shaking my head in wonder so much of the time.  I’ve been trying to capture some of it on film (or digitally, I guess I should say).  This one photo shows where I buy my chicken.  I think I’ve mentioned before that I get it at our local butcher (which is such a blessing; he didn’t used to always have it but has started carrying it I think largely because I purchase so much from him each week that he knows that the frozen chicken will be sold out of his coolers!).  The only bummer is that most of the time when I go in there (or, rather, stand outside hoping I don’t need to actually walk onto the blood-dripped floor), there is a sheep bleeding out on the floor.  It’s so hard to hear, see, and smell that sight!  And this is from a city girl who grew up spending weekends on the family farm and even seeing the cattle going to the butcher house….but man, it does add an element of stress to my shopping experience!  I am also still amazed at the cuts of meat that are the select cuts in the cultures around me.  I tried to capture one as the woman getting the “yang” (which can best be translated as mutton) in front of me was instructing the butcher what to cut off.  Literally all the meat in the bag that she was purchasing was white—either bone, tendon, or fat!  There was maybe 10% pink anywhere.  How different from our higher priced, lean cuts of meat that are so preferable in the US!

Hud's 2 friends--"dinner" and "dinner"

our wheels in ChengDu

And I’m seeing the differences in my kids, too.  When we were in ChengDu at the sporting goods store, we were playing outside for about an hour, killing time before we needed to head to the Papa John's nearby to pick up pizza for dinner.  While we were there, my kids made friends with some other "English" people (Americans) who happened to be doing some shopping, too.  Karis must have talked with these two American women for a total of 10 minutes, but she evidently bonded deeply.  On the way back to the hotel, she continually referred to "Aunt Sarah" and "Aunt Laura."  I finally questioned her on this one, saying something along the lines of, "You sure only knew them for a short time to be calling them Aunt so and so...."  Her response?  "Don't worry, Mom.  It's a TCK thing." (TCK standing for third culture kid, or a kid raised in a culture that is both different from their parent's and their host culture, making their experience living abroad a "third" culture.)  There's a book written years ago by the third culture kid gurus.  I've pulled it out and am re-visiting the content.  A mom can never be too over-prepared!

Karis w best buddy in the mtns.

As I write I’m actually on my way back from an amazing weekend—of more travel!  For my birthday, Kevin sent me off on a plane to meet one of my best friends from Tianjin (where we used to live) in a city in between (Xi’an).  It was such a dear time of refreshment!  Natalie is a friend with whom I connect on a deep, heart level, so time with her always benefits me in so many ways; and we laugh a lot!  So I again got more Tex Mex and won’t admit to how many times we just hung out at Starbucks, sipping our lattes and talking about those big and little things that busy moms just don’t often get around to talking about.  The time with her was a gift that will no doubt be the emotional and social fuel that will keep me going for some time! 

figure out the meaning of this one...

And now the summer schedule for the Joseph Family School has officially begun!  Assuming the kids got their final work for the week done on Friday morning (after I left town on Thursday afternoon), we have wrapped up most of what we needed to accomplish for this year of study.  Partly because we have so little to do around where we live, the kids have agreed that doing some school throughout the summer is okay with them.  So we have this week pretty much off (except for Chinese class that they all still have 4 days a week in the afternoon), and I’ll be putting together final lesson plans for the summer.  Then next week we’ll move to a two day a week schedule, doing Chinese, starting our new language, and working on math, writing, and a bit of reading.  I’m hoping that having some structure will help us all keep our sanity and not get too bored!  We’re still waiting to find out what the summer baseball schedule will look like.  One of the frustrations in working here is the last-minute planning which is so common in this culture.  Kevin hasn’t been able to get confirmation from any of the possible field locations that they can use their facilities for the summer; so we’re on hold, probably until June when the Chinese schools get out (at the end of June).  We’re hoping for a good balance of baseball that’s not quite as intense as last year’s 5 or 6 days a week schedule.  Kevin and the kids were all worn out by the end!  Sure hoping that this summer is cooler and a bit lighter on the baseball end of things….

First Anniversary!

our "lake" in the mountains

We've made it!  Now over a year here in our new city out west.  And we all agreed that definitely called for a celebration!  We had a family meeting and decided that we still should keep celebrating our original anniversary of when we first came to China (Sept. 3 or 4, depending on if you look at it as when we left the US or when we arrived in China!  And depending on which day works out better with our schedule to do the proper celebrating such an occasion demands. :)  So since this NEW anniversary celebration falls on March 24 and the two anniversaries are about 6 months apart (and since the kids have another excuse now to play a family party), we decided to begin the annual tradition of celebrating our XJ anniversary, too.

So what did we do?  Well, unfortunately not much.  We had big plans originally.  I canceled afternoon classes (including Chinese with their tutor, which they are doing 4 days a week now, so a day off is a huge relief; nothing wears out the brain like studying a foreign language!).  Their first request was to go to the zoo--where we've never been.  But since it was still so cold here (not getting up over 45 or 50 degrees), we were informed that most of the animals would still be kept in the indoor facilities.  I wisely had a friend (who knows Karis well) recommend that we wait until the animals were relocated outside, as the indoor facilities are pretty heart-breaking and pathetic.  So our next plan was to go to an aquarium that we heard was pretty good.  I must admit that this struck me as hugely ironic, being as our city is known to be the furthest city from any body of water in the world!  What better place to have an aquarium?!  Now the fact that one of the main features is a mermaid show--that's right--a mermaid show, maybe speaks a bit to the variety of marine life that is housed at this particular aquarium.  But in spite of Kevin's and my hesitation, we decided it would be a fun adventure and undoubtedly provide quite a few laughs.  But alas, the best laid plans of man....  Kevin woke up the morning we planned to celebrate with a high fever and body aches all over.  Thankfully his virus only lasted about a day and a half and no one else caught it, but he was under the weather enough to not be able to go and the kids certainly didn't want to go without him.  So we went to Plan B (or is it now Plan C?).

our kite

We still skipped afternoon classes and the kids and I walked to our favorite western restaurant and they each got milkshakes.  It would have been a great conciliatory celebration, except for the debacle on our way home.  I let the kids run ahead of me when we were a few minutes from home so I could grab the lettuce for our salad that night and a ton of chicken for our Easter celebration we were hosting that weekend.  While the boys ran around outside in our courtyard, Karis took the keys to let herself into the house (haha!  it's an apartment, but in China since we're all in apartments, you can call it a house).  Unfortunately, she took our previous encouragement to put a little more muscle into turning the key in the lock to heart, and accidentally broke the key off in the lock of the front door! I arrived at our doorstep to find her sobbing, so upset at the mistake, freaking out at what to do next.  I banged on the door, which my sleeping, sick husband did not hear from bed.  Then I called him and he came and we developed a plan through the closed door (he was locked inside at this point and we were locked out--with 24 chicken breasts and a head of lettuce in hand).  He was able to take apart all the locking components from inside enough for me to be able to shimmy the broken part of the key out of the lock and get the door open.  We decided (a bit cynically perhaps) later that night that our day was a pretty fitting anniversary celebration!  We like to describe our general feeling throughout the week that "XJ fights back"--it feels like we get kicked in the gut pretty regularly and need to just keep on plugging on along!  We did get to make up the celebration later that week....

And I did make some fun new discoveries!  The kids always plan the menu for our anniversary celebrations, and I've just figured out how to make ricotta cheese, so we had lasagna!  It's amazing how simple it is to make the stuff; I didn't dare attempt doing one more thing from scratch, but this one is so easy that lasagnas might become a regular staple around our house.  My dear friend in TJ who sends us care packages pretty much every week with the import products we can't get out here had sent me both cheesecloth and lasagna noodles, so I was ready to go.  And after you use milk to make the cheese, the leftover milk (called whey, for those of you who are as clueless as I am) can be used in all sorts of baked goods in place of water (like homemade breads, which we do a lot)).  It's supposedly really healthy and adds a fluffiness to baked goods too.  And I had an abundance of mini marshmallows that needed to be used since our hot chocolate days are winding down, so I made the kids' favorite rocky road brownies that have melted marshmallows and icing on top.  I think I'm not used to such sweet desserts anymore--I could handle about a sliver and then had to hand the rest over to my sweet-toothed family to devour!

giving a ride to a friend's daughter

A few days after our attempt at an anniversary celebration, we were able to escape to the mountains unexpectedly.  We found out at the last minute that Kevin couldn't use the baseball field he usually does for his Saturday afternoon baseball clinic.  So since there wasn't time to find an alternate location, we decided to head for the hills.  We threw some peanut butter and crackers and apples in a bag, grabbed the boys pocket knives, and ran out the door.  It was a great day!  In spite of the fact that the roads up to the mountains were largely shut down still, we were able to make a great play place.  Granted, it was pretty much all dirt and rocks, but the kids were in heaven.  We bought a kite along the side of the road on the way and spent the day hiking of ravines and running down the dirt roads trying to get the kite in the air.  When we first arrived at the head of the road where we usually are just entering the mountain park area, we found huge mounds of dirt and rock, barricading the road so you couldn't drive any further.  Waiting there was a herd of Kazakh horsemen, ready to lead you on horseback to the more aesthetic part of the park (for a price!).  After walking up the road on foot, I'm not really sure why the road was closed off.  I will admit to being a bit suspicious that maybe the roadblock was intentional--a ploy to force the callow tourist to get a lift on horseback.  Pretty clever if that was the case!

The next day we hosted an Easter gathering for our foreign friends here in town.  We had a sweet time of fellowship and food.  I was thrilled that the marinade I'd found on-line to tenderize the chicken worked pretty well (it is mainly comprised of egg whites and rice wine), making the chicken not nearly as tough as it's known to be out here!

Dear friends from TJ

This past week we had two guests from Tianjin come to visit.  The first grade teacher at the kids' former international school (she taught 3 of my 4 kids) offered to spend her spring break here with us just overseeing our homeschool day and helping out as she could.  She's also considered the dyslexia specialist for the school, so I was of course thrilled to have her eyes on my "classroom" to give me feedback and counsel.  The other friend who came with her is the oldest daughter (11th grader) of one of my dearest friends.  This young woman is incredibly mature and was an excellent travel buddy for our teacher friend, as well as a gift to our kids to have her company and creativity in play!  So we spent about 2 1/2 days doing school as normal and then of course had to get out of town and show them the grandeur of the mountains we love so dearly.  They ate it up.  And this time we went to a more scenic location that we discovered wasn't technically open yet either.  We were able to drive into the park and then had to park our car.  The place we were trying to get to was another 13 km (about 8 or 9 miles!) uphill!  Thankfully, we found another group of Kazakhs, this time with cars, who we were able to hire for a ride up and back down.  Once we arrived at our destination at the top of the mountain, we didn't see another person the whole time we were there--which was about 3 or 4 hours!  I don't know when I've had that happen here in China before.  The peaceful quiet was truly refreshing for my soul.  I'm not sure if I'm just getting older or if it's China, but man do I relish any moment of quiet I happen to come upon these days...

one of my 4 monkeys (in a neighbor's courtyard)

This week has felt especially full with many of our friends in our community coming and going.  We have two families who have been Stateside for 3 months or so returning, and two more who are leaving.  Because getting food here (both the actually finding of it and the preparation) is so challenging, there is never a shortage of food needed during these times of transition, so I've been busy in the kitchen trying to help lend a hand where possible.  We've had guests or delivered 2 meals and some banana bread already and have 2 more to go before the weekend is over.  I'm thankful that we are at the stage where I have such good helpers!  Karis made her own batch of no-bake cookies (no eggs so you can eat the raw cookie dough) and Noah is more than happy to help me peel carrots and potatoes--for a price!  (But he's cheap--I can get him to do about 8 carrots for 1 kuai, which is about 1/6 of a dollar!)

So spring is in full bloom here.  The weather has been beautiful (although it's cold enough today that Kevin came home looking for his long underwear that have been packed away under the bed again!).  The kids have been loving getting to be outdoors, the snow has melted, and we've even got grass growing now (in a few small spots anyway) so they're not coming in as covered in mud as they were.

***News flash:  I'm having to amend that last paragraph already!  While walking home from the coffee shop where I was writing this entry, I made a sad discovery.  The powers that be in our apartment complex are obviously pretty intent about keeping kids off the grass here at all cost.  The largest area that the kids did have to play--usually soccer, as that is the most popular sport here--has now been barricaded off with a line of large bushes!  They not only lined the whole perimeter with the impenetrable foliage, they also put a big one (not pretty, though) smack-dab in the middle of the "field"!  So sad.  Seems like surely they could sacrifice the grass in one small plot to allow the kids a spot to play.... :(

We're winding down with school--only about 5 weeks left in our curriculum (but don't tell the kids that!).  We'll continue with a bit of a summer school schedule here, too, mainly focusing on language.  The kids are making such progress with their Chinese that we'll keep going through the summer, only dropping down from 4 days a week to 2.  The kids and I also are looking for a tutor to teach us all together (since we're all beginners) the U language that is so prevalent around us.  We're all ready to start understanding more of what is going on around us!  That's about it from our end, but I'm sure I'll have more adventures to report in no time. :)

Cross-Cultural Chaos

It seems that we've had a string of pretty humorous cross-cultural interactions of late.  I'm sure not complaining!  This is good because it means a couple of things.  First of all, it means that we have at least SOME cross-cultural interaction (rather than hiding inside and baking chocolate chip cookies every day to escape what can sometimes feel overwhelming as we try to learn and embrace a new language and culture).  Secondly, it means that I haven't acculturated to the extent that I don't notice these "peculiarities" to a "normal" American!  I'm at least somewhat aware (even if not acutely so) of some of the differences to what would seem normal to a person in the US.  So here they are.  A few of our favorite moments from the last few weeks....

Karis w/ one of her besties--Trapper!

Sunday afternoons I try to go "a callin" on neighbors--visiting a family or two who live in our complex and bringing them some small gift, usually something I've baked.  This seems to go over really well, and I think it's serving to deepen some already existing friendships and help develop newer ones.  With so much of my time during the week spent grinding through a full school day with the kids, the weekends tend to be my best time to have a longer period of free time in case an "a callin" visit turns into more than just a quick hello at someone's front doorstep.  Well, a few weeks ago it did get a bit extended.  One of our favorite neighbors was so excited to have us drop in and our timing was perfect--she'd just finished frying up a "huo yu" (which literally means, "live fish").  I panicked a bit.  I'm NOT a fish fan--at least not in China, where it is guaranteed to have bones all over (they even have a special tool at all the local hospitals for removing the bones that get stuck in your throat; most of my local friends have had the experience of going in for just such a procedure) and usually still has all the scales and face on it, too.  And then the fact that she used the word "live" freaked me out as well.  I kept hoping I had misunderstood her Chinese and maybe it was another word...But thankfully, although I was right in my translation of the word "live," it was only alive when it was brought to her.  The killing and frying had already taken place.  And even the face/head was removed.  Not so much the tail, scales, or bones, but I had an incredible opportunity to grow in appreciation for Karis and her great attitude.  She downed not just one piece of the bony fish, but happily agreed to a second when it was offered.  (BTW, this was at about 4 pm--not my idea of a tea time snack and we were certainly not eating at a meal-time hour!)  Following my daughter's lead, I managed to eat a second helping, using my fingers to reach into my mouth and pull out all the teeny-tiny bones that I kept accidentally chomping into in between trying to hold a conversation in NOT my native tongue.  Whew!  I was exhausted by the time we left.  But incredibly thankful for such a go-getter daughter who smiled throughout the whole thing, in spite of the fact that she had the tail (which was pretty much all scales) for the second serving!

Cookie decorating--complete w/ headband in place!

Karis and I made another weekend visit to a neighbor's home who also has an 11 year old daughter.  I have just grown to love this sweet girl, and she seems to enjoy coming to our home (after she warms up a little at the rowdiness that 3 younger brothers bring into a home!).  We stopped in on the neighbor to ask the daughter to come and help us decorate cookies.  While we waited for Karis' friend to gather her things, the mom disappeared into a bedroom and returned within a minute, promptly brushing Karis' hair back (which was of course down and free-flowing, which is her usual style--one that takes hardly any maintenance in the mornings!) with her hands and then placing a head band with a large bow on it right on her.  We were so tickled!  I kept trying to imagine that happening at any of my friend's doorways in Dallas!  Karis took the grooming and the hint at her need of an accessory all in stride, and even knew to keep the headband in place until her friend went home (when we were both a bit confused about if we should return the head band or not; we tried, and when the mom insisted we kept it, she stuck it back atop her head).  Guess now we know that more accessories are better...

What we do for fun--can you find all 5 Josephs (including the cat)?

The next day I saw the girl's mother as we both headed to the market stores at the same time.  I'm not sure about the details, but this mother is supposedly somewhat well-known throughout the city, being some sort of TV personality.  So she seems to be a bit of a strong personality, and definitely comes across as a really confident woman.  When we started chatting about her daughter, I was so saddened when she immediately began to compare her precious 11 year old with her 4 year old younger sister.  In Chinese culture, it's totally normal to compare kids and to have favorites (we're regularly asked which of our four kids is our favorite).  But I didn't know that it is obviously the norm in the U culture as well, so I was shocked when the mother was explaining to me how great her 4 year old is because she has such an outgoing personality and loves to dance and sing, whereas her 11 year old is reserved and shy (and small for her age).  This broke my heart, and I was completely frustrated by my lack of ability to go on and on about how precious I think the 11 year old is!  I just didn't have the words in Chinese that I needed.  I gave it all I could to pump her up, and then returned home with a new fervor to study more--to get those adjectives that I wanted to share what a gift that little girl is!  Look out lady; I've got the vocab now and am armed and ready for another "bash your kid" session to be shot to pieces!  And I'm thinking what a great opportunity to invest in a precious little girl who undoubtedly feels the favoritism in her home; I'm just not sure how that wouldn't be a major shaping influence on any child's life.

Table set and ready for guests--always!  A sign of being hospitable...

I'm finally figuring out how hospitality works in this culture.  Or maybe I should say, "starting to figure out..."  It's complicated and such a high value that it takes serious study in order to do it well and not offend.  This past week we had a neighbor family give us a huge honor--they brought us some of their dinner!  Just at dinner time, one of their kids showed up with a plate filled with spring rolls that they had made.  They left the food and the plate with us and scooted back to their home for their own supper.  I've heard that delivering whatever you're eating to good friends is a way of showing hospitality to close friends, so I was delighted to see that some of my times spent "a callin" and delivering banana bread and chocolate chip cookies was seemingly being reciprocated!  Now I will confess that this prompted an additional purchase this week, too.  I'm a little leery of how the whole "drop your dish off with the food on it" works, specifically in regard to returning the plate.  I know in theory you are supposed to put something else that you've made on the dish and return it; but the problem is what if they don't do so?  Or what if it takes a month to return?  Not sure what the statute of limitations is on returning the plate, but I don't have that many to spare, and I'm kind of partial to my Corelle set that is all matching.  So all that to say, I decided to purchase a "song-ing" (the Chinese word for deliver-ing) platter and bowl and make food delivery another part of my routine.  We'll see how the neighbors like my western cooking!  (I did eat a bite of the spring rolls--which I confess, I hate! The seaweed wrapper just does me in every time...and I ended up spitting the bite into the trash.  Don't tell my kids, I just couldn't get it down.)

Boys lunch during one of the "sick days"

I've mentioned before how crazy the ideas of what causes sickness are around here.  Well, springs where we live are strange as far as the weather goes.  It's still in the 30's most days, but then it can occasionally jump up into the 50's.  These rapid changes in temperature are NOT okay with our Chinese neighbors--we are all destined for major illness!!!  So even if it's up in the 50's, you're going to see people dressed in their full down (or fur) coats, along with all the cold-weather accessories you can imagine.  Our good friends have two of their kids still in Chinese school, and we all kind of cracked up when they canceled school for 3 days (that just never happens here) because a quarter of the class was sick.  The reason--they all needed to stay home and indoors because being out in the weather change was making the whole school get under the weather!  No mention of washing hands or spreading germs, but it was all contingent upon the rapid fluctuation in the temperature being too much to endure!  And even more funny was that at the same school where the sick germs were obviously circulating, another one of the kids (also with a good number of sickies in her class) had a party.  One in which they were doing cooking together!  Guess what they made?  Fruit salad!  When the fruit salad was prepared, the whole class enjoyed it--all out of one bowl, which is typical Chinese style of eating!

What we do for fun on long, cold winter days!

When I went "a callin" this past weekend, the neighbors I visited shared that their two little kids were sick and they were about to head to the hospital.  I expected the kids to be acting pretty puny, so I was surprised as I hurriedly downed my cup of tea (I wasn't sure if I needed to finish the whole thing in order to be polite!) and watched the little boy and girl bouncing around the room, giggling happily together.  They had had fevers for the past two days, so the normal is to take your kid to the hospital and get an IV for them!  How extreme does that seem for us?  Eating and drinking normally, but a slight fever for a few days leads to a day or more in the hospital!  My kids are thankful we haven't followed the traditional eastern ideas for medicine...

Bball in the COLD!

Our weekends have been especially full as of late.  Usually Kevin has baseball on Saturday afternoons, so he heads off with a carful of kids--literally up to 10 at a time in our smallish mini-van--along with another coach or two and a rear end filled with all the required equipment.  The last few weekends the temps have been above freezing and there have been more kids than usual showing up, so they've moved to having their practices outside rather than the indoor, underground facility that has pillars scattered throughout, making the view from second base to the batter's box somewhat of a challenge.  So last weekend I went along to help out; Kevin even let me borrow one of his gloves with his name stitched on it! :)  I was shocked by a few things:  1) how cold it was once the sun had gone down a bit (you can see the snow still surrounding the turf field we use in the picture), and 2) how MOST of the kids who come have little to no coordination!  It's amazing to see how most of the kids in the 6-8 year old bracket can't begin to catch or throw a ball to save their lives.  Participation in regular sports here is such an anomaly that the kids just don't develop what we totally take for granted as being "normal" in the US.  So I did a lot of running and chasing balls that were so far out of my reach I didn't have a chance to get to them!  One of our neighbors is a 16 year old and he was explaining to us this past weekend how he has to study for a basketball test.  We're still confused on the details, but it sounds like he has no basketball classes or instruction, yet somehow he has to take a test (we're still not sure if it's just a written exam or an actual skills test) in a few weeks!  The Chinese educational system does love tests...

Kevin's extra clinic for adults--loving to act like kids!

English lesson in session in our living room

Before baseball practice Karis and Eli have discovered a new way to earn a few bucks.  They are teaching English lessons to a neighbor!  One of the moms that I've gotten to know has been asking me for months if we're sure we don't have time to have her son come over and just do school with my kids.  Now, this young man doesn't speak a lick of English, so I was pretty sure that it might cramp my regular homeschool routine (which is all in English, except when the Chinese tutor comes in the afternoons four days a week).  But I did finally tell her that Karis and Eli have been wanting to 1) teach, and 2) make some spending money, and she jumped at the chance!  So 4 weeks ago the kids started preparing lessons, each of them teaching for a half-hour (so it's a total of an hour for their young friend).  It's worked out so well!  The kids have really surprised me with how responsible they've been, working during the week to prepare power point presentations to present new material, games for them to play to practice vocab, and even homework for him to take home and bring back the following week.  His mom seems pleased and the little guys seems to love it also, and Karis and Eli each earn the equivalent of several dollars every week that they can spend at their discretion.

The start of the problem....

...and the counter-flow solution.

And the last crazy cultural moment was just this morning.  I was sitting in my nook, the really small space off our master bedroom where I do my morning reading, when mayhem ensued below.  People yelling (that I could hear our closed windows, eight floors above the commotion), horns blaring, dogs barking.  I stopped my reading to check out the scene only to find that someone was obviously staging a protest right at our apartment complex's exit gate.  Their car was parked there and they weren't budging!  This happens pretty frequently when there's a dispute over payment that needs to be made before the security guard allows the vehicle to leave.  Well this morning it had everyone backed up for quite a distance, right at the hour when people were trying to get to work.  The solution?  Move one of the somewhat portable flower fixtures so that the cars could squeeze through (if they went VERY slowly) to get to the other side of the guard house and go out the entrance of the complex.  What a mess!  Cars continued to blast their horns and even the older dancing ladies who meet in the courtyard daily to exercise through dance paused to observe what sort of fight might break out.  I think we did avoid that this time, but the cars certainly passed slowly through those planters.  Ahhh.  Never a dull moment!

Back to the Cold...

How cool an invention is this?

We landed back in our "host country" almost two weeks ago, and we've got our footing and are running ahead full speed once again!  The several weeks we spent in Thailand over the Chinese New Year were fantastic.  We had such a great time to rest and reflect on the past 10 months that we've been in our new western city, as well as lots of medical stuff done again and time visiting with friends.  Being able to vacation in such a beautiful location that is so close to where we live (well, close I guess is relative; it only takes about 12 hours to get there by plane!  I shouldn't complain; we do have friends who went by train--3 days straight on the train before then taking busses the rest of the way!  They didn't even know how long the total journey took them, but it was "about 5 days!") is a blessing that we certainly don't take for granted.

One of our favorite travel treats...

Karis at Catmosphere--the cat cafe

So many foreigners travel during the Chinese New Year, and Thailand is such a popular place to go, that connecting with friends there is relatively simple.  We had so many friends from our former city who were also there, so we were able to make the rounds.  We even spent time with one family that Kevin and I met 13 years ago when we worked at an international school in Manila, Philippines for a semester!  It was a sweet reunion, and we're hoping that we can find a reason to make a trek over to their island for a visit at some point.  Some of the highlights of our time were going to a night safari (but we went during the day, which we were told was actually preferable), a water park, a cat cafe (which was a "restaurant" the size of your kitchen, bursting at the seems with 22 cats roaming around--even on the tables where we were eating!  yuck!), and ice skating.  The kids normally love fishing the most, but would you believe that a "storm" blew in this year while we were at the beach.  No rain or thunderstorms, just really strong winds that made the ocean unsafe for the small fishing boats we usually hire for a cheap rate to take us out.  Everyone was bummed, even Kevin, who I now know looks forward to that as much as the kids!

Karis with glasses--and Swensen's ice cream!

I should probably have started off with admitting my unbelievable blunder.  We actually missed our original flight!  Our travel plans are typically left completely up to me to arrange and coordinate, and I love doing administrative tasks like that.  I have my file all printed out with everything in the order in which it will be needed.  Well, this year I fell victim to the challenge of our region's weird time zones.  Technically, we are on Beijing time.  But no one in my part of town operates on that time; instead we all have our watches set 2 hours earlier.  So whenever you schedule anything with anyone, or whenever you see times printed out, you have to clarify if it's BJ time or local time.  It is sooooo confusing!  Well, our flight info was printed out on BJ time, but I just completely missed that and was thinking of local time.  So long story short, we arrived at the airport (thinking we were two hours before our flight) to find that it was actually leaving the runway right then.  I've never had such a horrible feeling in my stomach.  After many tears and feeling like I was going to throw up for about the next 12 hours, we finally were able to get re-booked on another flight.  But that was only after Kevin and I both spent about 6 hours on skype the following day, drove across town to pay one fee that needed to be paid in cash, and then finally caught the next flight available, which was two days later than we'd planned.  Kevin was so worried about me after making such a huge mistake that he insisted that I get a complete physical done while we were there in a city with good (and cheap!) medical care!

Noah with a jelly fish discovery

And I'm glad that we did get the medical stuff done, because we got some surprising results.  Karis got glasses for the first time (which wasn't a big surprise; I figured she was squinting for a reason!), Kevin is evidently eating too much chicken (weird!), and I have lots of tiny cysts all over in my chest that they think are due to the hormones that I'm probably getting from the chicken that we eat.  Bummer!  We certainly eat chicken about 4 or 5 days per week, so I'm having to do some major adjustments in our meal planning; I'm trying to get more creative with both beans and vegetables.  We're all supposed to get checked out again in about 6 months, which is good timing as we're hoping to do another triathlon on the east coast again then, so hopefully we can time it to do some racing and medical checks at the same time!

Our re-entry back into China was much more difficult than Kevin or I anticipated.  It seemed like every individual we met immediately upon entry was just plain angry.  Kevin got his foot stamped on (really hard!) right as we got off the plane, the taxi drivers refused to take us to our hotel (literally speeding off around us, knocking over our bags as they hurried away), the lady at the counter of our hotel wouldn't give me an extra blanket and yelled at me for having a child sleep on the floor (even after I explained that I had 4, not the typical 1 here in China, and I couldn't fit more than 3 in the bed!), and every flight and driver that was scheduled arrived at least an hour later than they were supposed to.  Sigh.  Welcome home!  It was a great reminder of why we try to leave the country periodically for a period of de-stressing.  It really is unbelievable how it mounts and affects so many areas of your life (and disposition!).

Valentine celebration with our Chinese teacher

In spite of our somewhat rough cultural re-entry, we were happy to be home.  The friendships that we have started to form here make returning so much easier!  It is culturally appropriate here to buy gifts for close friends when you go away on vacation, and it was so encouraging this time to have a whole list of people to buy for!  We've been delivering hand soaps and dried fruit to the friendships that are developing, and it's truly a joy to be getting into the lives of those around us.  Our Chinese teacher stayed with us for dinner to celebrate Valentine's Day, and Karis and I taught her how to make our favorite "mug cake"--an individually-sized cake that literally is cooked in a mug in the microwave.

Hud posing w a bag of Lays

So now our "normal" is in full swing.  Kevin is back in to work and study and the kids and I are homeschooling away once again.  We've kicked it up a notch with our Chinese study, which I think will be really good for the kids and they've handled incredibly well (it helps that we have a precious teacher who dearly loves them!).  The weather is still amazingly cold.  As I type, it's 4pm (or 6pm, if you want to use BJ time!) and only 10 degrees Fahrenheit outside!  Snow is still falling and ice is still everywhere, and I think we've got another month or so of this yet to come.  The pollution has been off the charts bad as of late (like over 500 on the 500-point scale), so we've been staying indoors more and keeping the air purifiers on high.  Every time I wash my hands I say a little exclamation of thanksgiving; the water in our apartment was shut off for about 36 hours, and that has to be by far my least favorite aspect of living in a developing nation.  I had no idea how much I took running water for granted.  I grew up camping out, so I didn't think it would phase me too much, but I now see that having a "camp out" mentality makes a huge difference.  When I'm in my home, I want to flush the toilet.  I want to wash the dirty dishes.  I want to do laundry!  So every time we lose water and then have it come on again, it's such a reminder of how much we take for granted and how much we expect.  (Maybe I should be using first person pronouns here... :)  I guess it's sometimes those little things that we expect that can make such a huge difference.

December Highlights

Christmas dinner

     "Oh, Ashley!  Come in!  Baier has just had his penis cut off!"  These are the words directed at me 2 weeks ago when I knocked at the door of one of our new friends' home hoping her son could come over and play for a bit.  Noah and I both did a double-take, regained our composure, and were ushered into the living room filled with women eating, visiting, and bustling around the room.  Noah's eyes were huge as he looked at me and repeated over and over, "Mom, I don't want to go; Mom, I don't want to go; Mom, please don't make me go!"  I tried to reassure him that it was okay, knowing myself that Baier had not actually had his penis cut off, but had just been circumcised (and this was my friend's way of communicating it--obviously a non-native English speaker).  The scene before us was such an experience!  The women were all dressed up (and I was mortified that I had on jeans and a sporty zip-up hoodie), heads covered, looking very elegant and proper.  In spite of my inappropriate attire, the women moved around the coffee table and gave me a seat of honor, those who could speak Chinese engaging me in polite conversation.  Noah went in to visit Baier, who was in pain after his procedure (what 6 year old getting circumcised in a Chinese hospital wouldn't be hurting?!), but was thrilled to have a friend stop by.  I found out that the men (mainly family members and close friends) had had their party that morning and now it was the ladies' turn.  All this hubub was for Baier--to celebrate this right of passage that is part of the Muslim culture for young men to go through.  We stayed for some time, visiting and eating (Noah getting his pockets--all of them, and he was wearing cargo pants!--stuffed with candy).  Noah asked on our walk back home if Baier had really gotten his penis cut off.

Fam tradition--hiding the stockings!

Two nights before Christmas we had a terrifying thing happen--an earthquake in the middle of the night that almost shook us out of bed!  Kevin jumped up and we both ran to the kids' doors, getting ready to grab them and do I don't know what.  When you're on the 8th floor of a 14-story building, what do you do in an earthquake?  There is no safe place to hide, no place to run and escape.  We were in an earthquake one other time about 5 years ago in Indonesia and I still count it as the most frightening experience of my life.  It is the most helpless feeling to see things falling and breaking around you, to feel the ground shaking and moving beneath you, and to feel like there is NOTHING you can do.  So we prayed--a lot!  We had just watched the movie "War Room" that night before bed with the kids, so maybe I was spurred on by Priscilla's boldness in making out-loud, bold, specific requests, but I followed right along in her footsteps and cried out for help.  We were relieved when the shaking subsided and nothing in the house was even broken.  The kids had slept through it all!  Kevin and I, on the other hand, were rattled enough that we had no chance of sleeping any time soon.  We spent the next few hours awake, but managed to get lots of Christmas preparation done in that time!

Christmas morning

Our Christmas celebrating was sweet overall.  We drove across town to join friends on Christmas Eve, singing together and enjoying fun holiday baking that everyone contributed to make a feast.  Christmas day itself felt a bit "weird," in the kids' words.  We read the Christmas story and opened gifts in the morning, talked on skype with family, then had the rest of the day to lay low, build Legos and spend time as a family.  I did make some of our favorite dishes and we had our good Chinese friend, who also works for Kevin's company, over to join us for dinner.  We went really light on gifts this year, and it's been neat to see how the kids weren't disappointed with what little they received, but really seem to be delighting more in more in giving to others (they had all saved up their money to buy gifts for the other family members).  Living out here, where it really is hard to find material things to get excited about, I think really is making all of have the "less is more" mentality; we're increasingly more satisfied with fewer physical things.  But I should probably be careful not to misrepresent us here--the things that we did get were VERY much appreciated!  I can't get over how little boys can spend so many endless hours building Lego creations....

Trapper outdoors!

One of their favorite gifts had to be the harness and leash we gave Trapper in his stocking.  The kids were so surprised, but have been dying to take him outside, as they're convinced he desperately wants to see the outside world.  So Trapper made is brave entrance into the real world, complete with his first sled ride down the hill and (cautiously) walking through the snow drifts.  He didn't last long, as it was really cold and he started shivering, but seemed to enjoy the experience and satisfied the kids' longing to let him be "free"--at least for a few minutes while he enjoyed the outdoors!

Noah and his new best buddy

swimming party!

We were given money for Christmas to spend on the kids, and one of the things they agreed would be fun to do was invite their 8 friends (2 other families, each with 4 kids also) to go swimming at the hotel pool that is nearby, but too expensive to go to very often.  So this past Monday I took the 12 kids to enjoy 4 hours at the pool.  They had an absolute blast!  They were in constant motion the whole time (which resulted in everyone sleeping in the next morning until somewhere between 8:45 and 9:15 am!  It was beautiful!!).  My favorite part was Noah making yet another new best friend.  (Where does he get this personality from?!)  He chose the largest man I've ever seen to be his buddy.  I looked up to see Noah being launched across the pool by this man (who of course didn't speak any English).  Noah kept going back for more, and the man thought it was hilarious and continued to roughhouse with Noah and the other boys.

I know--I'm terrible at selfies...

I had a great moment doing homeschooling with Noah this week that again reminded me of what a TCK he is (Third Culture Kid).  We were going through this curriculum called First Language Lessons that was covering proper nouns and dates.  I followed the teacher's script, asking Noah in what year he was born.  He answered without hesitating, "The cow."  I stopped, shocked, trying to figure out what he meant.  Then it dawned on me, he was answering correctly--only using the Chinese Zodiak calendar!  He was born in 2009--the year of the ox.  And not only did he know his "birth year," but he knew all the rest of the family's too!  (I looked them up to see if he was right!)

chicken on the loose

Karis and I went with our Chinese teacher to search for a local style tea set.  I've of course had my own teapot and set since we've been in China, but the local friends we have here use a totally different style. You actually drink out of a bowl rather than a small cup like is typical of Chinese tea sets.  So we're having enough local guests over these days (yea!  huge praise!!!) that I'm getting tired of borrowing a tea set each time.  Our Chinese teacher told me she knew where to go to shop for one, so Karis and I took the afternoon to go with her.  It was quite an adventure, but we walked away with a beautiful set that should help me speak love to our guests.  And Karis met some chickens on the way home (she never misses an opportunity!).  These guys were selling chickens that were hanging out outside their store in boxes.  They looked huge, just from their heads poking out, and to prove how big and healthy they were, the guy grabs one and practically throws it toward us!  I squealed and let him know that the chicken was running away as the bird started strutting around the parking lot, looking for something to peck.  He assured me that it wouldn't run far, and just laughed at how amused we were at the large fowl.  Oh, the things we just never experienced in Dallas during a day of shopping...

chicken in his home!

We had some of our closest friends over for New Year's Eve--a fun couple with a one year old daughter.  They asked a great reflection question over dinner--our biggest highlight of 2015.  I'm a little sad to say that it was a bit of a struggle for Kevin and me to answer!  We certainly feel that while this year has been a good one, and one for which we're really thankful, it's also really been marked with a lot of significant challenges for us.  But by dessert we were able to have a longer list of some of the best moments and were able to narrow it down to a few highlights.  The biggest one I've been reflecting on is seeing the kids (Karis and Eli in particular) growing in their faith.  It's been really amazing to see them take ownership of what they believe, asking questions and really having a heart for others and for sharing with those around them.  We go to Thailand for Chinese New Year and plan on having the two of them baptized there in the hotel pool with a group of friends present.  They've been preparing for this for months now, going through material in preparation, and it's fun to see their excitement over it.  And while I'm bragging on them a bit, I should add in that Eli has become my main fix-it man.  He spent over half an hour on the floor (as you can see in this pic) with his hand up the backside of the toilet just to get the seat affixed properly for me!  It's pretty amazing how willing and adept he is at fixing things around the house!  Ahh...counting the blessings of 2015 and hoping that your reflections, too, hold much thankfulness in the faithful provision we experience!

Eli being my big helper